onsilverwings

Hopefully (waiting to hear), I will be transferring to UT-Austin for the Spring 09 semester. I will have been at Penn State for 2.5 years and I'm in active member in several student organizations.

If I am accepted to transfer, I'm going. Should I tell people as soon as I know or should I wait until right before I leave? My closest friends at school don't even know that I put in the application to transfer because I wasn't sure how to tell them. I'm not even sure if I'll get in either, you know?

entomom

Tell them once you know for certain that you're transferring. I agree that there's no need to tell them that you've applied, but once you know you're leaving, you should give them time to find other people to take your club responsibilities. And as for friends, they'll be sad you're going, but glad that you're doing what's best for you. With Facebook, cell phones and travel, you'll be able to stay in touch with your close friends after you leave, so it doesn't have to be good-bye forever.

orchid317

I am (trying to, at least) transfer from Penn State this year as well! Hopefully you will know your admission decision far in advance so that you will be able to tell your organizations as entomom said...as far as friends go, you really don't need to tell them until after you are accepted so that they do not get worked up for no reason or try to talk you out of leaving PSU. Good luck!

RickVA

I agree that it's best to wait until you've received your acceptance, then tell them.

In my experience, I sat down with each of my close friends and told them the reasons why I was going to transfer. They all understood why I was doing it and wanted what's best for me. Hope this helps...Good luck!

Sally_Rubenstone

Here are some suggestions about telling friends from The Transfer Student's Guide to Changing Colleges (yes, I confess I wrote this book, but, no, this isn't a plug ... I swear! The book is ancient and way out of date.)

--Not only should friends hear the news promptly, but your closest friends should hear it directly from you

--Be aware that your friends may feel abandoned or at blame for your choice

--Make your reasons for leaving clear. Emphasize the pluses of your new college ("Campus housing is guaranteed") not the drawbacks of your present one ("I don't want to get stuck in another scummy apartment next year.")

--Expect some to try to talk you out of transferring.

--Really listen to advice from friends (it could have merit), but make your own decision

--Call on college counseling services to help with especially sticky situations

THE GOOD NEWS: You may spend hours agonizing over how to tell your friends that you're going to transfer, only to discover that they're completely in agreement with your decision--or are even hoping to transfer themselves!

THE BAD NEWS: The more supportive your friends are, the harder it may be for you to leave them! "I'll never find such great people at my new college," you're apt to lament. "Maybe I should stay here after all."

Cheer up. One of the adult lessons you learn sooner or later is how to hang on to the people who really matter to you as life goes on. Saying goodbye is tough; keeping in touch takes work. Yet think of transferring as a way to meet more friends, not replacements for the ones you already have.

speakout93086

I also think it's important to make sure that your professors know that youre leaving and why. You never know when you'll need a letter of recommendation, and professors at your old school will probably be your best resources for such things, at least for a while.

gobackto2005

Thank you Sally_Rubenstone, your advice is deft. helpful!

Sally_Rubenstone

You're welcome, gobackto2005

I also think that speakout93086 makes a good point about talking to profs.

In fact, my advice to any student is to build a relationship with professors, and this is particularly true for anyone who has even the slightest inkling that a transfer may be on the horizon. I've often heard complaints from would-be transfer students that their transfer applications require a faculty recommendation but that they don't know any prof at their current college well enough to ask.

So, by making an effort to get to know professors from the get-go, it will not only enhance the quality of one's college experience, but also provide a potential source of references, whenever they may be needed.

onsilverwings

I know this is particularly delayed, but I wanted to thank all of you that contributed to the thread. Your advice is extremely helpful and I'll definitely be following it.