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Replies to: Acceptance Shaming ("she only got in because she's _______")

  • JoBennyJoBenny Registered User Posts: 777 Member
    Happens on these boards all the time. The waitlisted and "rejected" blaming the many URM, athletes, legacies, "hooked" peers who must have taken THEIR seat at XYZ U, for without them, they most assuredly would have been accepted. Or not.

    Welcome to Bowdoin Adira.....Go U Bears!
  • NewHavenCTmomNewHavenCTmom Registered User Posts: 2,022 Senior Member
    I didn't read the whole article but this happened to DD after her acceptance to Yale. I should have warned her, but I didn't expect it to come from a student at her uber diverse school. The perpetrator? An Asian girl whose stats aren't as good as DDs and has no clue as to what DD has been doing for the past 3 3/4 years. DD suggested that they print their respective transcripts & resumes and compare. The girl walked away in a huff. Lol when you try to give people proof, they slither away.
  • hinge47hinge47 Registered User Posts: 7 New Member
    I saw some of this at my kid's school. Sad but predictable. After he got into his first choice, I told him to be prepared for this kind of sours grapes, and that he should rise above it.
  • collegebound752collegebound752 Registered User Posts: 558 Member
    It's sad that it's so relatable.
  • siliconvalleymomsiliconvalleymom Registered User Posts: 4,461 Senior Member
    You can see the data for acceptances and rejections for your own high school on Naviance. What is the difference between "shaming" and acknowledging the truth?
  • NewHavenCTmomNewHavenCTmom Registered User Posts: 2,022 Senior Member
    edited May 2014

    Lol...Let's call it what it is...jealousy! Pure & simple....but it's okay! She worked her behind off and the proof is in the 3 Ivy League acceptances and other top LACs.

    DD is in the top 5% of her class! amazing Ecs that are very unique, rigorous/interesting summer experiences each summer, amazing LORs that brought tears to my eyes, great ACT SCORES, she took a rigorous course load, doubling up on sciences, language and math for 3 years. Dual enrollment at our local state college, lots of awards...

    Haters will always hate! It's so unbecoming.
  • Sue22Sue22 Registered User Posts: 4,734 Senior Member
    Sadly, I find myself encouraging my D, a strong double legacy at her first choice school, to compete for a recruiting spot in her sport. The donor/legacy card would be more powerful but I worry that she'd feel like she only got in because of her family. At least if she's recruited for her sport she can attribute any success she receives to her own efforts.
  • NewHavenCTmomNewHavenCTmom Registered User Posts: 2,022 Senior Member
    Oh yes, she was the first student at her school to be able to take an AP course in sophomore year because of her proven hard work in freshman year!!! W
  • NewHavenCTmomNewHavenCTmom Registered User Posts: 2,022 Senior Member
    @Sue22‌ @siliconvalleymom‌

    There is a boy who is #1 at DDs school...an incredible young man who is just perfect in every way! His dad is a professor at Yale and the master of one of the residential colleges. He got into Harvard & Princeton. This same Asian girl said he only got in because his dad is a Yale Prof...said my dd got into all of her schools(including Yale) to fill a black quota...lol again, jealousy!!!! She has an excuse for everyone beating her at her own game. And what's hysterical is that she is #20 in the class...and had no idea what it takes to get into an Ivy and tried!!!

    She told me last spring she was definitely going to Stanford or Yale. Those were the only 2 schools she was applying to...I just sat & listened quietly...laughed inside at her smugness..DD is very humble and never brags about her accomplishments...and gets embarassed when they are brought up. The day she said these vitriolic things about DD, DD suggested that they print their respective transcripts & resumes(right there, on the spot to avoid resume doctoring) the girl walked away red and in a huff...lol. When they are faced with hard facts, they can't deal...oh well!!!

  • collegebound752collegebound752 Registered User Posts: 558 Member
    Hate to hear those stories @NewHavenCTmom but I am glad that your daughter doesn't let it get to her :)
  • NewHavenCTmomNewHavenCTmom Registered User Posts: 2,022 Senior Member
    It stung...but I told her to get over it because she was going to hear it again! So get ready for the next round...and that when people can't say certain things about you...they hurl the black quota phrase at you..it's just as demeaning and hurtful. Especially when she has literally busted her hump to follow her passions(taking early morning trains to the aquarium where she is a docent and to NYC for another EC, workshops on Saturdays to improve her tutoring skills, she is a literacy volunteer) I forgot to add, she works a part time job...all those summers when this girl was hanging out, DD was at programs and doing medical research at YSM....et al....

    What gets me is that the sense of entitlement...it's so ballsy!

  • collegebound752collegebound752 Registered User Posts: 558 Member
    Your daughter deserves all of the good things that come her way :D I am glad that people like my article.
  • NewHavenCTmomNewHavenCTmom Registered User Posts: 2,022 Senior Member
    edited May 2014
    @collegebound752‌ isn't it interesting how very few people have responded? Very interesting indeed!
  • collegebound752collegebound752 Registered User Posts: 558 Member
    It's both interesting and sad.
  • desie1desie1 Registered User Posts: 871 Member
    I loved this article! I think college shaming happens all the time, and I also think that almost everybody is guilty of it at some point. I posted the article on my company's Facebook page. Over 250 people saw the article (on corporate pages Facebook keeps track of how many are the article). I went to the website where it was originally posted, and I noticed there were other great articles so now I'm going to regularly read the website!
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