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Does Your Child Meet Your “Text-pectations”?

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Replies to: Does Your Child Meet Your “Text-pectations”?

  • momofsmartdancermomofsmartdancer Registered User Posts: 260 Junior Member
    sorry... typo. *5 hours/ day: should be "5 hours away".
  • YnotgoYnotgo Registered User Posts: 3,530 Senior Member
    edited August 7
    My son prefers to use Facebook Messenger. I like that because it shows whether a message has been seen and the last time he was logged on.
  • Studious99Studious99 Registered User Posts: 713 Member
    This thread is a little scary... yikes! I'm so glad that my parents aren't helicopter parents. Sure, I will talk to them once a week over the phone. But anything more than that is overkill.
  • Cjesusinme1Cjesusinme1 Registered User Posts: 85 Junior Member
    I am a teenager and I know how teenage guys feel. We love our parents but we don't want to show it. So, I would suggest that you give him some space and text him every 2 weeks or have a discussion with him about when to text him.
  • sittlesittle Registered User Posts: 58 Junior Member
    Yeah, I echo the non-parent responses that the helicopter parents on this thread are scary, and are definitely not representative of what is normal.

    I studied abroad in Cuba where I didn't have a phone and had to go to a hotel across town for internet. I believe I went almost 4 weeks with absolutely zero contact with my parents. Nobody freaked out.

    I normally Skype with my parents on Sundays if we're both free. We actually have real conversations rather than superficial texts. It's about quality rather than quantity.
  • homessdhomessd Registered User Posts: 10 New Member
    I plan on setting these "text-pectations" early on. I don't like texting normally and I want my college experience to be social and academic in equal parts. Having parents chime in hourly would be too much imo. I would rather have meaningful connections for maybe an hour each weekend when I have time set aside than ping back and forth endlessly like it's Facebook. With me. And my parents. No thx :)
  • NorthernMom61NorthernMom61 Registered User Posts: 3,024 Senior Member
    What level of communication is right between students and parents depends on the student and his/her parents. The communication scheme usually evolves over time and hopefully works for both parties. When it doesn't it would be nice to work it out openly by talking about it rather than passively not responding in either direction. When there isn't the possibility of communication each side manages. That doesn't mean that one or both parties might like more. I don't think you can make a judgement as to whether or not someone is a "helicopter" parent based on this thread.
  • playacarplayacar Registered User Posts: 40 Junior Member
    One strategy that has worked out well for our family is for the kids to call me when they are walking around campus. that way i get to hear their voices and they keep in touch without wasting study or recreational time.
  • momofsmartdancermomofsmartdancer Registered User Posts: 260 Junior Member
    edited October 21
    I agree with NorthernMom61. Also of note is I get the feeling that I might be labeled as a "helicopter" parent. The fact is, I rarely contact my daughter; she contacts me. She uses the strategy explained by playacar, calling me and texting me while she is walking around campus. While I am glad to hear from her, sometimes I think it really interferes with work or projects I am working on. I am the type who likes intense focus on things and getting interrupted makes me less productive.

    "What level of communication is right between students and parents depends on the student and his/her parents. The communication scheme usually evolves over time and hopefully works for both parties. When it doesn't it would be nice to work it out openly by talking about it rather than passively not responding in either direction. When there isn't the possibility of communication each side manages. That doesn't mean that one or both parties might like more. I don't think you can make a judgement as to whether or not someone is a "helicopter" parent based on this thread."
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