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Questions for initially shy/introverted Carls

cbugcbug Registered User Posts: 614 Member
edited August 2011 in Carleton College
This question is for current Carls or alumni who were pretty shy and/or introverted going in as freshman. How did the Carleton environment affect your social skills as time went along? Did you change for the better or for the worse?

In general, do you feel it is easier to improve one's social skills by being surrounded by other shy/introverted/quirky people? Or is it best to put yourself in social/academic situations with outgoing, extroverted types?
Post edited by cbug on

Replies to: Questions for initially shy/introverted Carls

  • imbri3imbri3 Registered User Posts: 100 Junior Member
    Hi cbug - I will be a sophomore this year, and I would categorize myself as a rather introverted person. I actually struggled a lot to make friends coming in as a freshman with a quiet personality, and it made for a very tough first term or two.

    Regarding your question of whether it's better to hang out with other introverts vs more extraverted people; I actually think it doesn't really matter. In the end, what I discovered is that it's more important to just keep putting yourself out there, even if it means being super awkward at times or going to lots of events/activities and not knowing anyone (both going in and coming out). What ended up happening to me was I finally found a group of friends I clicked with through a club, who for the first time made me feel accepted exactly the way I was (pardon the cliched-ness), introverted and all, and who I now consider the best friends I've had in my life.

    Regarding your first question of how I've changed; I don't think I've changed personality-wise. I think I'm more confident and accepting of myself, but I'm pretty sure I'm as introverted as ever.

    I think the important thing is to find people who you can form a genuine bond with - for me, it was through a club we were all passionate about - who like you for you. And to accept that that might take a while to find. Hope this helps you/whoever you are asking this for/anyone who might need help with this, and feel free to PM me if you have more questions.
  • limnerlimner Registered User Posts: 458 Member
    Cbug, my son, when asked for advice once about going off to college, said that for him it was really important in the first term to go to all those freshman functions that the college organizes. There you'll meet both introverts and extroverts who are all in the same boat as you: looking to make new friends at their new school. As imbri3 said, put yourself out there, and you'll meet people you click with.
This discussion has been closed.