right arrow
Examples: Monday, today, last week, Mar 26, 3/26/04

Suicide by rejectees?

ShneadShnead 64 replies21 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
edited March 2010 in College Admissions
Has anyone ever heard of someone killing themselves after being rejected from their top choice schools?

Just asking to know what kind of press this would give to a college, let alone the cut-throat business of college admissions.
edited March 2010
20 replies
Post edited by Shnead on
· Reply · Share

Replies to: Suicide by rejectees?

  • Youdon'tsayYoudon'tsay 19210 replies459 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    Well, that's a horrible thought.

    Back in the day, I did know a girl who quit her college first semester because she didn't get into the "right" sorority.
    · Reply · Share
  • glam407glam407 146 replies29 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    Not yet.
    But I feel like as the admission process gets more and more competitive with the coming years it's likely to happen
    · Reply · Share
  • Collegestress16Collegestress16 1118 replies44 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    I used to think that if I didn't get in to the schools I wanted, then I would die and just completely give up. I'm sure it has happened before. It sure has happened in asian countries such as japan and china, where students are given a major test that can determine what college they go to and their life. One japanese boy placed two upright pencils on his desk and slammed his eyes into the pencils.
    · Reply · Share
  • jellypigjellypig 7 replies4 threadsRegistered User New Member
    was there really such an incident? any links? =O
    · Reply · Share
  • sunday1xsunday1x 151 replies5 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    Unfortunately it does happen. The reason being that so many leaders in these kids' lives tell them that unless they get into their dream school, they will amount to nothing. This kind of pressure is terrible and can lead to cutting and even suicide.
    · Reply · Share
  • Collegestress16Collegestress16 1118 replies44 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    sorry, you might be able to google it but its a story my Japanese teacher told me.
    · Reply · Share
  • PeaPea 2378 replies9 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    Everyone needs to learn how to be disappointed. Whether that means not getting your dream job or accepted into your dream school or being rejected by someone you have a crush on. There is always another job, another school and other fish in the sea. There is always another way to live the life you want.
    · Reply · Share
  • sunday1xsunday1x 151 replies5 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    Exactly. I just feel bad for the kids whose parents put so much pressure on them that they are afraid to face their parents....Ahhh it's just sad...
    · Reply · Share
  • KeilingerKeilinger 511 replies89 threadsRegistered User Member
    Thanks, Pea. I think I always felt that I'd never get over it if I were rejected from my top choices, but that's changed now. And hopefully, even if someone gets in, that acceptance won't be the high point of their college career. There's so much to be done that college decisions should seem like a speck in the grand scheme of things.
    · Reply · Share
  • FLVADADFLVADAD 1575 replies27 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    Lol, more interesting would be to know if any parents killed themselves over it.
    · Reply · Share
  • mom2collegekidsmom2collegekids 84104 replies1025 threadsForum Champion Financial Aid, Forum Champion Alabama Forum Champion
    I've heard of schools having "suicide watches" after rush week. I don't know of any particular instances of girls committing suicide over not getting into the right sorority....

    That said, there was a boy who committed suicide right after winter final exams. It is believed that he knew he didn't do well and didn't want to face his parents.
    · Reply · Share
  • KeilingerKeilinger 511 replies89 threadsRegistered User Member
    What's the big deal about not getting into a sorority? I've seen the term "rushing" used a lot, but never really wondered what it entailed. I guess if rushing were humiliating in itself, it could double the hurt caused by a rejection.
    · Reply · Share
  • NorthstarmomNorthstarmom 24049 replies804 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    I'm sure that there have been students who committed suicide after being rejected by a college just like there are people who commit suicide after being rejected by a potential romantic partner.

    Unfortunately, many people don't have the good judgement to realize that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

    If a student did this, it wouldn't reflect badly on the college that rejected them, but would reflect the student's impaired mental health and judgment.

    I hope that anyone here considering such an action will talk to a trusted adult or a professional in the mental health field because something is wrong if a person is considering taking their life over a college rejection. Getting rejected by your dream school doesn't mean one is a horrendous failure or one will have a miserable, unsuccessful life.

    Getting accepted by your dream school won't mean that you'll have a life 100% full of joy and success. Everyone has their own share of struggles, joys, and achievements no matter where they go to college. However you define success, some of the most successful people didn't get into their first choice college or even colleges that were highly regarded. Some people who are living ordinary lives or even are living lives that are unsuccessful --how ever you define success-- went to top colleges and their dream schools.

    What you do in college and afterward is more important than where you go to school.
    · Reply · Share
  • paint_me_purplepaint_me_purple 70 replies16 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    I'm a senior now, but earlier in high school I dealt with depression and suicide thoughts/attempts. I luckily had supportive people around me and I got through everything.
    In the past few months I was deferred from ED 1 to ED 2 and eventually rejected from Wesleyan, my top choice; I was completely crushed. I had terrible thoughts racing through my mind again, and while it's easy to think it's the end of the world, it's important to understand that this process can't define an applicant. As someone who has been through emotional low points and rejections, I can honestly say it's not worth the thought.
    I'm still upset about it, but hey, I got into NYU, McGill, Bard, Geneseo, and I'm waiting on a bunch; there are a ton of other options for everyone. Even if I had nowhere to go, the whole process is so unpredictable that it doesn't warrant a lot of emotional investment.
    · Reply · Share
  • meghnasridharmeghnasridhar 768 replies19 threadsRegistered User Member
    I think suicides for the board examinations in India (one set of 5 exams and NOTHING else determines which college you get into) are definitely prevelant, and show the UGLY side of our education system. Our top college (for the commerce/arts students) has a cutoff of 97.5%. In India, that's ridiculously difficult to get and it leaves absolutely no room for errors. You can be a top maths student for 12 years, and get tripped up in ONE question because it's faultily worded, and that's it. That's what you have to show for 12 years of straight hundreds, or whatever.

    I'm not saying suicide is the right solution at ALL. But I wish people working in education would realise the flaws in the system and try and reduce this awful stressload a little.
    · Reply · Share
  • toledotoledo 4788 replies290 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    I'm a mother and it makes me sad to think that someone would even contemplate suicide over a college. I can understand "disappointment", but many people on this web site have dealt/will deal with being turned down by their first choice schools. They will go on to find happiness at another school. Please trust me on this. Many people come back to this web site, saying they can't believe how happy they are at their second-choice schools.
    · Reply · Share
  • fineartsmajormomfineartsmajormom 1178 replies13 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    paint_me_purple really captured the issue. Kids don't generally commit suicide because of one incident...they already have depression and one or two bad moments can send them spinning out of control. While kids lucky enough not to suffer from depression do have their disappointments and some hurt with more or less intensity these bad moments don't lead to thinking of self destruction in a serious way. Paint_me_purple has a great attitude and shows that she/he is able to see the disappointments as just that..painful and sad moments in life but they are not validation of self-hating, selfdestructive behavior. Paint_me_purple knows depression but also knows how to prevent the really dangerous linking of events to negative/self-destructive thoughts. BUT look around you this week...if you see a friend or relative that you know fights negative feelings already they are going to be affected by bad news in a much more serious way....don't be silent..reach out, show them that they are loved and cared for and needed no matter what comes in the mail this week. Just because you get good news or you are able to take rejection in a healthy way doesn't mean everyone has those internal resource and make this the week to support someone else.
    · Reply · Share
  • R124687R124687 1489 replies24 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    We can SEE, in front of us, right here on CC HOW incredibly stressful this process is for SO many kids. As one who has close acquaintances and relatives with issues such as depression, panic attacks, etc...I URGE anyone reading this, and having ANY thoughts ("I just don't feel like myself right now", "I'm so stressed..when will this be over", "I'm crying all the time", "I just don't care any more")...to tell your parents you really want someone (besides them) to talk to about this. Do not think that suicidal thoughts are the only reason to seek therapy. It's VERY important that you NOT let this go so far that you're scurrying around trying to seek help if things get very bleak. Because it's hard to find a therapist quickly. I'm an adamant proponent of "self help" (toughen up, get over yourself, get on with it!).

    BUT... there are times when that just does NOT do it. I've seen first hand that these thoughts can affect people you NEVER thought would be affected...and it can be hidden until there is an explosion...and that therapy DOES help! Do not waste time, DO seek out a professional who can make you "feel better". There should be no stigma attached to it. It's as "legit" as cough syrup for a cough.

    If you're reading this, and you say "that sounds like me"...and talking to your friends or family is not an option, or not helping...make a phone call.
    · Reply · Share
  • NorthstarmomNorthstarmom 24049 replies804 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
  • tokenadulttokenadult 15970 replies1501 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    Find supportive people who care about you, or professionals who know how to deal with people having suicidal thoughts, if you feel bad after you receive your college news. This time of year (spring in the Northern Hemisphere) is actually the peak time of year for suicide in Temperate Zone countries. Suicide at this time of year may have nothing whatever to do with school issues or college application results, but it is a definite risk, so seek help if you need it.

    Good luck to all of you still waiting for college news. One young person I know who is still waiting for a bit more news is using his time constructively by finding part-time work in the field he loves, and lining up summer work for the summer--work he can take regardless of where he enrolls this fall. That's something to do besides worrying about admission results.
    · Reply · Share
This discussion has been closed.

Recent Activity