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Sample Admissions Essays - Accepted by Harvard, Princeton, Dartmouth, and Stanford

hannahmontanahannahmontana Registered User Posts: 480 Member
edited February 2012 in College Essays
What do you think of this essay? I found it randomly online when i googled "sample college essays" or something like that.

I just think it would be useful to hear feedback from ppl on what they think of this kind of an essay.

Here's the link: Sample Admissions Essays accepted by Harvard, Princeton, Dartmouth and Stanford
Post edited by hannahmontana on

Replies to: Sample Admissions Essays - Accepted by Harvard, Princeton, Dartmouth, and Stanford

  • anhtimmyanhtimmy Registered User Posts: 3,256 Senior Member
    All these essays were from rich kids who paid people to write it for them.
    Of course it's going to be good lol!
  • ab2013ab2013 Registered User Posts: 1,756 Senior Member
    Hmmm seen this essay before
  • FloatingSaturnFloatingSaturn Registered User Posts: 127 Junior Member
    seriously? it sounds like one big cliche.... that person must have had an awesome resume....

    "Immediately, I realized that I must dedicate my life to understanding the causes of the universe's beauty"
  • 2by22by2 Registered User Posts: 387 Member
    boring boring
  • setzer557setzer557 Registered User Posts: 338 Member
    I wouldn't believe that the essay was the reason that person got into HPS...
    The essay seems so impersonal and "BS"y.
  • 3Point7Student3Point7Student Registered User Posts: 757 Member
    "Surrounded by thousands of stars, complete silence, and spectacular mountains, I stood atop New Hampshire's Presidential Range awestruck by nature's beauty. Immediately, I realized that I must dedicate my life to understanding the causes of the universe's beauty. In addition, the hike taught me several valuable lessons that will allow me to increase my understanding through scientific research."
    First paragraph for stanford.
    one word (well 3)
  • hannahmontanahannahmontana Registered User Posts: 480 Member
    ^haha yeah that's what i thought, but i wanted other ppl's opinions first to make sure i wasn't just being overly judgmental.
  • adrivitadrivit Registered User Posts: 1,047 Senior Member
    These kind of essays are liked by adcoms?? gosh! so pretentious ....
  • celestialxxcelestialxx Registered User Posts: 180 Junior Member
    LOL I've read this before
    and honestly, I forced myself to believe it was good, and I seriously thought that essays were supposed to be like that xD
    BUT I GUESS NOT (><)
  • Adela8Adela8 Registered User Posts: 70 Junior Member
    haha... we read this in english yesterday
  • llpitchllpitch Registered User Posts: 4,318 Senior Member
    This is the most made up garbage I've ever read. It's probably faked.
  • OscularOscular Registered User Posts: 123 Junior Member
    haha... we read this in english yesterday

    yea me too... I thought it was too much
  • Nick017Nick017 Registered User Posts: 968 Member
    how do we know they actually were accepted... probably just saying that so you join their ****ty essay service
  • BlackEyeBlackEye Registered User Posts: 9 New Member
    Nicko17 u r probably right.

    But personally, I thought that the essay was pretty good, I mean isnt that what admission ppl wanna know bout? How personal experiences helped u to know urself and reaching ur desires, understanding ur goals? I admit there are some flaws like the one where he says that immediately he knew about his goal, but come on nothing can be perfect, right? And he also mentions about the roadblocks that will come and he says he will accept them.

    I know there are controversies but i still think the essay was pretty good
  • LaevenLaeven Registered User Posts: 298 Junior Member
    The essay's well written (smooth language, good grammar/vocab...) but I find the topic over done and a little dull. Dare I use the word sappy?

    It's got good metaphors and topics, but it seems very cliche and typical to me. Essays are only one part of the app though.
This discussion has been closed.