Welcome to College Confidential!

The leading college-bound community on the web

Sign Up For Free

Join for FREE, and start talking with other members, weighing in on community discussions, and more.

Also, by registering and logging in you'll see fewer ads and pesky welcome messages (like this one!)

As a CC member, you can:

  • Reply to threads, and start your own.
  • Post reviews of your campus visits.
  • Find hundreds of pages of informative articles.
  • Search from over 3 million scholarships.

How can an introvert maximize their college experience?

AsadFarooquiAsadFarooqui Registered User Posts: 153 Junior Member
I would love to know, please.

Replies to: How can an introvert maximize their college experience?

  • LindagafLindagaf Registered User Posts: 8,561 Senior Member
    The usual advice applies. Read the pinned post by @bopper on top things to do to meet people, and the other pinned posts too. They all have good advice. My D is an introvert, and she knew she needed to get out of her comfort zone, but also found it exhausting. She had to make time for herself too. She also didn't start making real friends until she began to relax. That can take a while, but just know that you are in the same boat as everyone else.
  • cfsnowycfsnowy Registered User Posts: 106 Junior Member
    Best advice I can give: you do you. There's nothing that says you have to become someone you're not in order to have what others define as a "maximized" experience. Take as much alone time as you need.
  • AroundHereAroundHere Registered User Posts: 3,592 Senior Member
    I have a deep introvert who is finishing a second year of community college. I agree that it takes time. I would suggest looking out for hands-on opportunities.

    Start where you are comfortable (or at least less uncomfortable). My kid had taken 10 years of dance classes before college and so it was easy to go try the dance club.

    Join classes with group projects or experiential learning opportunities. Her English 101 class was also an introduction to college class where the students were required to show proof that they used the writing center and were graded on whether they ever came to the office hours. This started getting her used to asking for help and talking to teachers. Other classes have had group projects or lab groups which have helped her be more engaged and less hesitant over time. When something besides just sitting in a lecture is a required part of the class, it gives you a little more push to be involved.

    If you keep showing up for things, you will eventually become less uncomfortable.
  • juilletjuillet Super Moderator Posts: 12,649 Super Moderator
    I agree with @csnowfy's advice: you do you. The stereotypical portrayal of a satisfying college experience is a loud extrovert going to all the parties, engaging in crazy antics, joining a bazillion clubs, etc. But that's because that's entertaining to watch on television, not because it's a realistic reflection of what your life or enjoyment has to look like.

    If your idea of a good time is making a small group of friends who like to discuss literature and listen to classical music in your dorm's lounge, then do that. Or sample good restaurants in the surrounding city, or have long talks about politics or current events, or attend low-key social events...whatever. And if you want to stay in your room some nights by yourself and read a book or watch a movie, don't feel bad about doing that, either! You've got four years; it's a marathon, not a sprint; you don't have to go out every night of every week in order to make lasting relationships.

    You do want to push yourself a little outside your comfort zone so you can grown and evolve, but that doesn't mean completely going against your own personality.
  • austinmshauriaustinmshauri Registered User Posts: 7,858 Senior Member
    Introverts need time alone to replenish their energy while extroverts need to be around other people to replenish theirs. If either are also shy it may take time and effort to step out of their comfort zone and try new things, but they should also plan to spend some time doing what they need to relax. For introverts it may mean taking a quiet walk or relaxing in their dorm before going to a party. For an extrovert it could mean hanging out with a group of friends before a party. You have to do what feels comfortable to you.
  • zannahzannah Registered User Posts: 1,088 Senior Member
    Being you is excellent advice, but what does that mean? What are the things that you really hate such as meet and greets, dark rooms with lots of people and loud music, sharing a table when studying, gun cracking, whatever. This stuff is basic to you so don't decline you have to participate because you are very unlikely to ever find this group acceptable to you personally. Find social opportunities where you can be comfortable and part of a group of or activity such as playing cards or other games, volunteering somewhere that you have a task you can do, whatever fits you. Just being present and visible helps to make you recognized as a member rather than an isolate. Know when to smile and save and maybe even do small talk...Then there are the personal challenges. You are expected to attend a social activity and your blood runs cold. Have a goal such as initiating a contact with one person, next time two people, etc. This is not designed to make friends but to develop some skill as speaking first when you have to. Even working someplace where your obligation is having to ask if you can ask someone if they want help is good practice. Casual, brief conversation at a grocery, for example helps. You can do it.
This discussion has been closed.