I've been out of high school for about two years now(graduated June 2016). I got horrible grades in high school due to household issues my father's abuse brought. Now my father is dead but I still fear despite the biggest issue in my life being gone, my mental health is still going to hold me back from performing well in college. I want to have a good gpa(the aim is a 4.0) by the end of my first 2 years in college considering the only school I should really go to with my gpa is a community college, and then transfer to a state university from there(preferably SUNY stony brook). My issue is that considering I pretty much didn't learn anything in my last two years of high school and that my mental health has only been getting worse, I feel I'll fail miserably in college which is why I put off going this fall. I'm still considering going in the spring semester for computer science but seeing as this is a demanding major I'm afraid I'm not smart enough or mentally healthy enough to do this major. Professional help is not an option I want to take so please don't recommend it. What can someone who didn't learn much in high school due to mental health issues expect in college if they've only been getting worse over the years? I'm not sure what I'll do if it turns out computer science isn't for me, or if college isn't for me seeing as this is something I really want to do but simply may not be able to handle. I would appreciate any insight on this as to whether or not I should attend college in my current situation.