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Being depressed/homesick freshman year and struggling

basitq14basitq14 Registered User Posts: 20 Junior Member
Hello everyone

I'am currently in my first semester of college and I'am struggling quite a bit. When I first moved in I was extremely homesick since it felt weird that after living with my family for so long I'am now going to live on my own in a crammed room. I began to severely miss my family a lot since I couldn't believe my school years went by so fast since now it came to this.

Right now it is the middle of the semester and I'm currently struggling if my GPA is not a 2.0 or above then I'm going to fail this semester. I'am also going to college on a budget and I might not receive financial aid if this continues. I currently have one F two Ds one B and one C. I decided that I'm going to speak to my advisor on Tuesday and in hopes that there will be some option for me. So far this semester has been really tough, I just wish I can get my grades up because in high school it was super easy to maintain your grades. This is my biggest concern

I'm still missing my family because I wish I can go back to my old room and relax play video games, enjoy the time I spent with my siblings. Im feeling really sad as I'm typing this. Things just don't feel the same anymore. If I can just get my grades up I will be happy and I can sleep knowing that I won't have anything to worry about. If anyone can please tell me what I can do to help me get through this it would be very much appreciated.
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Replies to: Being depressed/homesick freshman year and struggling

  • aunt beaaunt bea Registered User Posts: 9,530 Senior Member
    If your family is struggling to pay for this school, you need to honor their sacrifice by kicking butt in your classes.
    Go immediately to the tutoring sessions and office hours so that you can understand how you have to study.
    Studying in college is completely different than high school and, what you did back then, does not work.
    You have to go every day to the tutors.

    My eldest daughter found this out immediately, because her peer/grad advisor was a premed. He told her, even if you THINK you know the subject, there might be something that you didn’t think about, so you have to go to the tutors.

    My eldest daughter was lucky and kept busy. She went to school 3000 miles from home, so going to the tutors kept her focus on school and not on being homesick. She went most nights to the tutors, all throughout her engineering degree, to confirm how she was preparing for her classes. She went so often to the library building ( where tutoring for her major was) that the advisors kept offering her tutoring jobs!

    When her younger sister (dd2) went away to college (900 miles), our eldest advised dd2 to go set up her tutoring schedule immediately. DD2 normally didn’t listen to Dd1, but in this case she did. DD2 performed extremely well when beginning with the tutors at her UC. She was also asked to become a tutor. DD2 got into every grad program where she applied. With our son, he expected to be told the same thing.

    I know this may sound harsh but if you have the time, to be homesick, you aren’t using your time wisely. Remember that your family is proud of you and they wish for good things for you. They love ❤️ you and want you to be successful. It’s not easy on them to be separated from you. So, do right by them! Call them when you need a “pick me up” and then get back to work. It will go a lot smoother and faster if you focus on the work, in getting your degree.
  • CheddarcheeseMNCheddarcheeseMN Registered User Posts: 2,968 Senior Member
    Please take advantage of the student counseling services about your depression.

    About your grades, you need to start attending every class. I think it is unlikely that you are attending every class and keeping up with the readings and homework if you are getting Ds and F grades. Attending office hours is a great idea, too, but you need to keep up with the material in order to be able to ask relevant questions. Good luck!
  • aunt beaaunt bea Registered User Posts: 9,530 Senior Member
    Yes, I meant to include what @CheddarcheeseMN said: go to counseling services on campus. They are there for you. You won't be the only one who needs their services and it doesn't mean that you are weak, it only means that you are strong. It's a good thing that you can recognize it and that you may need some help.
  • Bubblewrap666Bubblewrap666 Registered User Posts: 158 Junior Member
    Great advice above. Also, if you find it difficult to get into the counseling services on campus, or find that you need more sessions than you are allowed as per campus policy, you may check your parents' health insurance policy to see if there are in-network providers in your area. Depending on your policy, and where you go to school, this may be another very viable (and affordable) solution to obtaining counseling -- even if you go to school many hundreds of miles from home.
  • basitq14basitq14 Registered User Posts: 20 Junior Member
    Thanks so much! I will consider going to tutoring as well
  • LindagafLindagaf Registered User Posts: 8,454 Senior Member
  • LindagafLindagaf Registered User Posts: 8,454 Senior Member
    Yes, follow @auntbea 's advice. You need to go to professor office hours, the tutoring center, form a study group, and do everything in your power to pass your classes. Failing that, withdraw from the class you are getting an F in. You have time, but you need to be proactive. College isn't high school and you have to look after yourself a lot more. Good luck.
  • basitq14basitq14 Registered User Posts: 20 Junior Member
    I would like to thank you again for giving your suggestion it worked out great as I have attended office hours
  • aunt beaaunt bea Registered User Posts: 9,530 Senior Member
    edited November 2018
    Thanks for keeping us posted!
    Keep going to office hours, your grades will continue to only get stronger.
  • basitq14basitq14 Registered User Posts: 20 Junior Member
    Do you honestly think Im not going to attend class and at this point I'm just sitting in my dorm doing nothing? haha no thats not the case I have attended every class and during that time I was attending every class I'm not just gonna throw money away by not attending every class. I worked very hard to get into the school Im in. I really love my major and my school its just living at a dorm thats tough but everything else is fine.

    At this point I have gone to office hours and gotten help with many assignments and it worked out great! If anything now is the time were people aren't attending class because freshman figured out that theres more to college than attending class and started to cut class and do those things instead. I have always attended every class. I have one class where theres supposed to be 12 students but only 3 showed up!!! So just in case I have attended every class and will continue to do so.
  • Sunflower1324Sunflower1324 Registered User Posts: 3 New Member
    Hey!
    Im also a freshman in college, and I'm also feeling really lonely and depressed. My grades arent suffering as much but if you ever someone to talk to I'm here. I need as many people to talk to as I can get. I know meeting people on the internet is always sketchy but I pinky promise you can trust me.
  • basitq14basitq14 Registered User Posts: 20 Junior Member
    Hey there

    Im glad to hear that your grades aren't suffering as mine might be. Luckily I made some improvements I was able to turn those ds to mostly cs now. I know its still not as great but its a much better situation now then before I have also figured out a new study routine to do better on assignments. Things now have been going great!

    You mentioned that meeting people on the internet is sketchy yes it is but Im open to anyone I can talk to. Doesn't matter who it may be you seem pretty kind hearted I will be more than happy to talk with you as well. I hope you feel better about being lonely or depressed since its hard to make friends especially since you miss home often.

    I made friends quite easily on my first day and didn't feel as lonely. In the first month I made like 5 or 6 friends which really surprised me considering how shy Iam. If you need someone to talk to you can trust me as well. Hope everything goes well
  • basitq14basitq14 Registered User Posts: 20 Junior Member
    Hey everyone

    Im happy to say that I passed my first semester with all the hard work and countless office hour seccisions. I passed most of my final exams and my gpa for the semester is a 2.4. I ended up with two As two Bs one C and one D. My lowest grade was an F because I failed math. Everything else worked out perfectly the changes I made to my study routine have worked out great for me as well. Im so glad I took full advantage of office hours. Thanks to everyone who gave me advise on how to do well. Right now is Winter break and Im currently working on a study routine for the Spring.

    Does anyone know how I can do better at math? Since Im a slow learner learning that much content in four months is literally impossible. I have always struggled with math. I need to take at least three levels of math to get my degree. Does anyone have any tips as to doing better in math? Im thinking about going to tutoring center at least once a week to get help with math. but is there anything else I can do such as youtube vids or anything? If anyone has struggled in math please tell me how I can improve since Im a slow learner and I have to learn like 50 units in four months. Any advise is appreciated.

    Again thanks for everyone who gave me great advise on how to improve my grades it was really a big help!
  • MaineLonghornMaineLonghorn Super Moderator Posts: 37,132 Super Moderator
    I think a one-on-one tutor would be most helpful. Can you go more than once a week? I had to get a tutor for a couple of tough college classes. I still didn't do great in them, but at least I passed. I'm pretty sure I went at least twice a week.
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