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How to join a fraternity?

orionaryorionary 346 replies46 threads Member
I'm finishing off freshman year, and I tried to join some clubs here and there, but unfortunately they didn't work out as expected. I just realized of a academic/career based fraternity here at my college that I wanted to join (but i missed their application deadline), but I still want to join probably this Fall 2019. My issue is, I don't know much about fraternities. All I know is each frat is different and not every frat drink or party. So my questions are:

1) How do I join? I know they have recruitment, but I find it awkward to come to to their table and start talking to them :/. I also don't have any friends that are in greek life, so I'm going solo.

2) What's the process of being recruited like? I know they do this "big" and "little" thing and have to attend rush and events and interviews.

3) Do you actually befriend everybody in the frat, or just the people that are joining as the same time as you?

4) What's the point of formals? I see pictures of other people posting themselves in formal attire, surrounded by other frat/soro people at a fancy banquet or something related.

5) Can you leave at any time? If something occurs and it's not working out for you.

6) Do you actually have to commit to it? Say, I have alot of school work to do and I can't make it to some of their events.

7) Is it wise to join if you're a Biology major + commuter?

Sorry if I have alot of questions. I would appreciate it if someone answers! :)
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Replies to: How to join a fraternity?

  • lbflbf 395 replies0 threads Member
    @orionary what school do you attend, every school is different? Academic/Career, Service based fraternities are different from social fraternities and will have their own recruitment process. Some schools have offices of student involvement or something like that they also might be able to help you navigate. My son rushed a social fraternity as a sophomore so I will try to answer your questions the best I can...

    1. Your schools website should have information about recruitment so you know how to proceed with that. You will have to put yourself out there so be ready for that. My son is a bit shy but he just did it and couldn't be happier. There are social fraternities, service fraternities and academic/career fraternities so see what might be a good fit. Some people can do more than one type.

    2.This will depend on the school you go to but they want to meet and get to know you. Big little usually doesn't happen until you are a member of the fraternity or at least a pledge.

    3. For social fraternities you really need to get to know as many people as possible but you will become close with the people in your pledge class if you do join.

    4. Fun and bonding

    5. Yes

    6. When you are a pledge you are committed once you become a member I think there is more flexibility.

    7. My son is a double major but does live on campus. I don't see why you couldn't do it.

    Good Luck!
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  • 10s4life10s4life Forum Champion UCLA 2462 replies52 threads Forum Champion
    edited May 2019
    @orionary Hi! Each school is different especially comparing small private schools vs big state schools. I go to a large school with nearly 2,000 guys in frats. Here’s a general answer to your questions. A lot of this echos @lbf. I rushed, and pledged a social fraternity my fall freshman year.

    1. Your schools website or Interfraternity council website/ social media should have info about recruitment and when or where it is. Don’t be nervous! Guys in Greek life are normal people and students just like you! Many rush solo a friend might help so try and see if a friend wants to rush with you just to make you more comfortable.

    2. Big and little matching is for pledging. Rushing is trying to get a bid (invitation to join). Pledging is like a trial period. Recruiting is a bit like speed dating you are getting to know the chapter and they are trying to get to know you. Be yourself and find a house you fit in best. My schools fraternity rush is sorority style and regulated because of the massive amount of people rushing.

    3. The people joining at the same time as you is your pledge class. Normally those are people you are initially closest with but a lot of times you’ll be closer with older or younger guys. In fact my best friends in my house are a year younger than me. Smaller houses are more tight knit. Mine is one of the largest at my schools with a little over 120 members and the truth is you know everyone but you aren’t close with everyone. And with any group within the house there will be the popular crowd etc.

    4. Formals are just plain fun. Like homecoming for prom in high school? Greek life formals and date parties are so much better.

    5. Recruiting and pledging are a no commitment process. You can also get dropped by the fraternity as a pledge.

    6. School always comes first usually. But if you joined the right house for you the fraternity is not a chore but something you want to do.

    7. Commuting and bio shouldn’t be bad. Most of y house is Econ/poli sci but I’m engineering and found it easy to balance

    Best of luck feel free to reach out.
    edited May 2019
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