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Help! I'm going to prom with the wrong guy!!!

mousetalk11mousetalk11 0 replies1 threads New Member
edited December 2015 in High School Life
Okay so I'll try an explain this in as little context as I can. My senior prom is in about 6 months (we have plenty of time!) and I have been totally convinced that no one is going to ask me. So today I was talk to my friend (who is a guy) about it and I kind of just asked him to go with me. we're not together or a couple or anything but I kind of just thought why not? he doesn't even live in the same town as me he lives about three hours away so it's not his prom either.

Anyways, in the beginning there was this one guy that I really wanted to go to prom with - and I kinda still do :/ but I honestly thought he wasn't going to ask me. But his mum and my mum are friends and apparently he was wanting to ask me to go with him! I only asked this other guy last week but thing is it's not his prom. I know this might sound bad but wouldn't it make more sense to go with someone from your school so you're both having what supposed to be one of the greatest nights of your life? Both these guys are two very close friends of mine and I just feel terrible about what's going on.

The guy at my school doesn't know that I already have a date either. Am I going with the wrong guy??? Which one should I be going with?? what I'm thinking is that I should be going with someone from my school if he wants to go with me because it's his night to, and if we went together we'd both be happy. If I go with the other guy then there's a happy kid who doesn't go to my school plus he'll have his prom later on in the year (so he'll go to two) while the guy from my school is sitting there thinking he could have gone with me but didn't. I'm really stuck on the fence here.

Can someone help me??? Which guy should I go with and it would be great if you said why as well!

Thank you xxxx
edited December 2015
14 replies
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Replies to: Help! I'm going to prom with the wrong guy!!!

  • LegendaryHIMYMLegendaryHIMYM 2 replies0 threads New Member
    I honestly believe that you should go with the guy that you wanted to initially go with. Like you said, the other guy is going to have his prom, anyways. Might as well be at your prom with who you actually want to be with. It's your night, girl. Do what you want. Yes, it may only be one night, but as the old saying goes, "Live every day as if it's your last." Just explain to the other guy the whole situation and hopefully, he understands. :D
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  • GMTplus7GMTplus7 14268 replies297 threads Senior Member
    he doesn't even live in the same town as me he lives about three hours away so it's not his prom either.

    Is it going to be a burden for him to travel 3 hours to do you a "favor"? Why not be honest and discuss the situation w him?

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  • mathyonemathyone 4193 replies34 threads Senior Member
    I'm wondering why on earth you feel you need a date for this 6 months in advance? Is this normal at your school? It's just a dance. I know people whose engagements were much shorter than that.
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  • aunt beaaunt bea 10175 replies70 threads Senior Member
    You need to be honest.
    I agree with @mathyone^^^, why do you have to book prom dates six months in advance?

    It's one dance. You will be extremely disappointed if you think this is supposed to be the best night of your life. It's a dance where you get to play dress-up. (I was surprised by some of my friends at my prom many, many years ago who claimed that they were disappointed, saying it wasn't up to the hype. I found it to be fun, so it's all in how you see it.)

    Don't overthink this. Be kind to your friends.
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  • nw2thisnw2this 2562 replies74 threads Senior Member
    Cancel with the long distance guy. You'll save him from driving 3 hours to help out a friend who'd rather be with someone else. You'll be doing him a favor.
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  • bjkmombjkmom 7949 replies158 threads Senior Member
    "one of the greatest nights of your life"?? Sorry, only in sitcoms.

    In real life, the greatest times of my life were spent with people who had staying power-- my parents, my siblings, my husband, my kids. Not someone I went to a dance with when I was 17.

    The guy you did ask-- is he doing you a favor or is he happy to be attending? I think that's what everything hinges about. The moment you asked him, this stopped being about you. You invited him to an event, and pulling that invitation because you got a better offer would be hurtful thing to do.

    So if this prom is a responsibility he's fulfilling because you're friends- if it's just a favor he's doing for you- then it's one thing. But if it's a night out with an old friend that he's looking forward to, then I think you've got to keep the plans you've made and show him a nice night out.

    The fact that " I only asked this other guy last week but thing is it's not his prom. I know this might sound bad but wouldn't it make more sense to go with someone from your school so you're both having what supposed to be one of the greatest nights of your life?....that I should be going with someone from my school if he wants to go with me because it's his night to, and if we went together we'd both be happy. If I go with the other guy then there's a happy kid who doesn't go to my school plus he'll have his prom later on in the year"-- these are all just excuses you're making to justify a choice that you suspect is wrong. None of those things have changed since you invited an old friend to accompany you so that you could go to the prom.
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  • mathyonemathyone 4193 replies34 threads Senior Member
    I think you should discuss this with your current date. My guess is he agreed just to help you out--or maybe he now thinks you want to be his girlfriend. Honestly, would you want to drive 3 hours each way to attend a school event where you don't know anyone, will likely never see them again, and everyone else knows everyone and is probably talking about in-jokes and school stuff that you don't know anything about? I think you need to discuss this and most likely find another way to celebrate with your long distance friend.

    You should tone down expectations. It's just another dance with longer dresses. You also should be honest with yourself about why you felt a need to drag your friend into not-his-prom 6 entire months in advance. Plenty of kids at our school go without dates and have a nice time. Plenty of kids form relationships during senior year and find a date they would not have expected to have. Why are you so afraid of not having a date that you have to plan this so far ahead?
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  • lookingforwardlookingforward 35295 replies399 threads Senior Member
    6 months is way too early to fret about who will ask whom. Just too early and makes me wonder how you think these things through.

    You can tell the first guy you realized it's terribly early and "Thanks for agreeing, but why don't we wait and talk about this in 4 months?"

    I do wonder if this thread question is real.
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  • 123365123365 60 replies23 threads Junior Member
    Ah Senior prom stress haha those were good times for me xD The reality of prom from my experience is that unless if you two cuddle at the table the whole night, you guys are going to be bouncing up and down to upbeat music and are most likely going to be pushed around by the big crowd of people. Your date is mostly there to just wear the same colors as you and you can still be in pictures with that other guy.
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  • WorryHurry411WorryHurry411 950 replies162 threads Senior Member
    It's unethical and rude but if you are really really interested in going with guy#2 then sincerely apologize to guy#1, at least if he has any confusion about you being interested in him, he'll get over it.

    Arranging a date so far ahead wasn't really a brilliant idea as you aren't involved with that guy. By the way, don't overlook probabilities of gyu#1 backing out or guy#2 asking someone else instead. It's highschool, most interests fade away in 6 months.

    If nothing works out, go with your friends and enjoy the night. Its really not that big of a deal in bigger picture of your life.
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  • WorryHurry411WorryHurry411 950 replies162 threads Senior Member
    Disclaimer: This advice isn't applicable to anyone who is trying to ditch a guy from their school to go with another guy from that school . That would be cruel.
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  • 8bagels8bagels 401 replies0 threads Member
    The downside of Early Decision.
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