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2016 and beyond wedding moms and dads

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Replies to: 2016 and beyond wedding moms and dads

  • fretfulmotherfretfulmother Registered User Posts: 1,931 Senior Member
    Wow guys good luck - and I'm carefully taking notes because we're behind you all in the process!!

    I have a question: I saw some earrings that I really would like to get for FDIL as a present. Is it appropriate for me to buy them for her as an engagement present or "just because" present from me? I didn't get anything for my son, but he's not the type to notice/complain about something like that. Do I have to wait until the wedding? I don't have any daughters, and I also don't really know how a young woman in her early twenties these days might feel about this, like is it too intrusive. (The earrings are really pretty, sapphires if relevant.) She won't have another birthday between now and the wedding.
  • daylily1daylily1 Registered User Posts: 20 Junior Member
    My daughter would have loved something like that.
  • Singersmom07Singersmom07 Registered User Posts: 4,174 Senior Member
    edited May 26
    So would mine. She would treasure it. And it can just be “I saw these and thought of you”
  • mominvamominva Registered User Posts: 3,028 Senior Member
    @fretfulmother, I think that would be a lovely gesture, a no occasion gift.
    Say something like, 'I saw these and thought of you. They could fulfill 'something new, and something blue' if you wear them for the wedding.'
    But then don't be discouraged if she has something else in mind - maybe a family heirloom.
  • jym626jym626 Registered User Posts: 57,422 Senior Member
    Congrats, @daylily1 ! Any particular diet regimen?
  • FlyMeToTheMoonFlyMeToTheMoon Registered User Posts: 2,932 Senior Member
    Really happy for you @daylily1!
  • HouseChatteHouseChatte Registered User Posts: 496 Member
    @greenbutton I like what @lookingforward posted about -- I think your family needs a minder for MOB. Someone dispassionate who can smile, nod, listen to her negativity, and gently steer her to someplace where her detonations do less harm. An alcove? A garden? A nearby bowling alley? All right, not that last one. But MOB sounds like a job and a half, and the rest of you have happy things to handle. I feel for all of you, especially FDIL.
  • fretfulmotherfretfulmother Registered User Posts: 1,931 Senior Member
    @sevmom @mominva @Singersmom07 @daylily1 thank you!! :)

    I did think both of the "something new" and also then thought not to bug about that, yes!!
  • snowballsnowball Registered User Posts: 2,919 Senior Member
    @greenbutton I agree a minder is needed. Can I assume this is typical behavior of MOB? If so, maybe the family has had to deal with this in the past? Maybe your son can gently take to his bride to be and come up with a solution. While your DIL to be is worried about her mother's behavior, it is still her mother and she may not want to rock the boat.

    Hopefully MOB will behave and the wedding will go off without a hitch. I can not imagine having to deal with someone like this on ones wedding day. My daughter had a bridesmaid's date that could have been a potential issue during her wedding that cause her stress prior to the wedding. The other bridesmaids were on top of this and made sure he didn't create a scene.
  • sevmomsevmom Registered User Posts: 8,336 Senior Member
    edited May 26
    @fretfulmother She may surprise you and be the one to bring that up! Oh, I can wear these for the wedding. The earrings sound lovely!
  • mom60mom60 Registered User Posts: 8,207 Senior Member
    @daylily1 that is my D’s wedding day too. I’m hoping for sunny weather and little rain in the next two weeks. Her preferred ceremony spot won’t happen unless the field dries out.
    @greenbutton my friend had a similar problem with the Dad of the groom. The groom had a couple of cousins who agreed to keep an eye on the Dad and quietly remove him if he got out of hand. The Dad ended up being on good behavior for the entire weekend. I hope for the same for your S and DIL. Maybe MOB will have other family and friends in attendance who she won’t want to embarrass herself in front of and will be nice.
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