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If your adult child lived far away from you, how did you get all their crapola to them?

HoggirlHoggirl 1578 replies193 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 1,771 Senior Member
Here is our situation - dh and I did a major downsize and are now living happily ever after in a 935 sq ft condo in Florida. Ds graduated in June and just started his job in California. We do currently have an off-site storage unit that is 5x5. In it we have luggage, coats (likely too many for our needs) on a hanging rack, some memorabilia (not much), and Christmas ornaments - no tree. We also have ds’s “stuff.” To be fair, he culled quite a bit when we came down to visit us last spring break. He has an accordion, a guitar, tons of piano sheet music, and some memorabilia (not much). I can’t remember what else. It isn’t a a huge amount - obviously, since a 5 x 5 space isn’t very large. We also have a small (3 x 4 but not climate-controlled) storage unit at our condo. We keep our beach toys in there. It isn’t particularly well arranged, so we could do better. The big stickler is the Christmas stuff. I was ready to chuck all of it, but when we did the downsize, the ornaments were the only thing ds wanted us to keep. We might or might not be able to go without the off-site storage unit if we got all of ds’s stuff to him. I’m not sure. I know we cannot do this while we still have possession of his stuff. There is not much extra storage within our condo. Our bed has built in drawers in the bottom, so there isn’t really much room under it. The second bedroom has a sleeper sofa, so no under bed there.

Anywho - I have rambled on too much about our own particular circumstances. IF you are still reading...how did you get stuff that belonged to your kids if your kids lived far away from you? It’s not like we have a truck’s worth full. We are paying $100 per month for our off-site storage - they just raised our rate. It’s not like he has a moving truck’s worth full. We aren’t currently inclined to drive all the way to California. But, if I could get all his stuff to him for less than $600 AND get rid of our off-site storage unit (as I said, not sure if that is workable - especially with Christmas).

Advice? Thanks for reading!
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Replies to: If your adult child lived far away from you, how did you get all their crapola to them?

  • Madison85Madison85 10305 replies408 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 10,713 Senior Member
    No advice, but I like that your son is holding on to his accordion (120 base?).
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  • Youdon'tsayYoudon'tsay 19093 replies454 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 19,547 Senior Member
    I would offer to keep the storage unit and have him pay whatever portion of the unit is his while his stuff is in it. Seems fair.
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  • wis75wis75 13892 replies62 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 13,954 Senior Member
    Now that son is done with school and has a job it is time for him to store his own stuff. You should empty the storage unit to complete the downsizing. We use closets in our much larger Florida house (whoever decided no one needs places for stuff without any basement???) with just one shelf for son's stuff from childhood. He/you can foot the bill for shipping stuff to his place. You no longer have the family home and have as little space as he does. No reason to pay extra to store stuff.
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  • intparentintparent 36291 replies644 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 36,935 Senior Member
    We’ve been doing the Southwest plan on each trip when kids come home or I go to them. :) Nut we have one item, a large framed nature photograph that D1 wants. I have it in Seattle, and she lives in DC. It is too big to carryon, and beyond the size for checking without a big fee. I’m making her decide what to do at Xmas this year.
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  • VeryHappyVeryHappy 18312 replies322 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 18,634 Senior Member
    We got lucky one year. S2 lives in Madison, WI. S1 at the time lived in Cincinnati. S1 hosted Christmas, and we drove (10 or so hours) to Cinci. S2 drove from Madison to Cinci (8 or so hours). We loaded up our car with S2's junk; then in Cinci we literally backed our car's trunk up to S2's car's trunk and did the transfer. Easy peasy.

    Not surprisingly, several years later S2 still hasn't unpacked all the boxes we transferred.
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  • abasketabasket 18857 replies847 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 19,704 Senior Member
    I don't know if I'd do this myself but you could ask your son to pay the storage fee if he just seems reluctant to deal with the stuff....

    Also your monthly price, wow! We rented a 10 x 15 space for a couple months this summer for under $100!!
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  • BunsenBurnerBunsenBurner 38405 replies465 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 38,870 Senior Member
    $100 a month to store stuff?! Yikes.
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  • thumper1thumper1 73293 replies3188 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 76,481 Senior Member
    I would do a road trip with the stuff he really wants. When he is at your place next, have him go through the stuff, and get rid of everything he doesn’t want. Then make a plan to rent a van and drive it to him. Fly home. Make it a nice vacation. Take your time.

    Our kid doesn’t have room in his apartment for ANYTHING from our house...and has given us permission to get rid of anything left. Your kid my just do the same when he realizes that it’s take it...or lose it.
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  • compmomcompmom 10599 replies76 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 10,675 Senior Member
    My kids on the opposite coast have shipped things on their own, a little more each year. My storage space is the same size as yours and costs $45. I live in a studio myself. I like to let them do these things at their own pace so I am not pushing them away, and they seem to take it on naturally over time. I did nudge my son by sending him a box of photos and memorabilia.
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  • shellfellshellfell 3247 replies11 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 3,258 Senior Member
    We just moved and downsized by less than half the living space. We were
    going to be faced with the OP's dilemma until S1 moved from California back east. We were able to make a trip to see him and bring his stuff. It immediately went into his storage space without opening a single box. We brought S1's stuff with us since he lives nearby. I doubt he'll open his boxes, except maybe his CD collection.
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  • busdriver11busdriver11 15178 replies28 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 15,206 Senior Member
    FedEx Ground. Huge boxes!
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