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Holiday's with the In-laws

fendergirlfendergirl 4620 replies159 threads Senior Member
With holiday season coming up, I thought I'd create a post to get people talking about how holidays go with the in laws. Either your own parent-in laws or possibly kid-in laws when they come to visit. Anybody have any good stories?
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Replies to: Holiday's with the In-laws

  • momofsenior1momofsenior1 7830 replies66 threads Senior Member
    In-law holidays are better for me. Less drama than my side of the family.
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  • musicmom1215musicmom1215 2718 replies56 threads Senior Member
    I've been divorced a long time, but my in-law family had lots of drama. My ex never liked his older brother. One time in our early marriage, the brothers got into an argument at Christmas dinner. I was shocked since my family does not argue in the first place and would never cause a scene at Christmas. Now my MIL has passed away and my ex has nothing to do with his brother.
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  • doschicosdoschicos 21574 replies226 threads Senior Member
    It'a nice that the two families mesh well and can enjoy the holiday together, @HouseChatte!
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  • fendergirlfendergirl 4620 replies159 threads Senior Member
    My SO's parents are visiting us for a few days at Thanksgiving and we're heading up to them for a few days at Christmas. They're staying at a hotel when they visit us (they're bringing their dog and I'm allergic) and we're staying with them when we go up next month. Should be interesting.
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  • wis75wis75 14168 replies64 threads Senior Member
    edited November 16
    I'll never forget the year the inlaw family of 4 waited to take their showers until they arrived on Thanksgiving day one year (school age kids). They had plenty of bathrooms (at least the 3 we had then) and arriving a half hour later ready to socialize would have been better than having them use our baths- I was prepared for the next morning use , but... Nothing quite like having your master bath space invaded when you aren't expecting it.
    edited November 16
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  • threebeansthreebeans 736 replies34 threads Member
    This is a relatively new thing for me, but I'm not looking forward to seeing some family members. If it's a smallish gathering (15-20 people) do you have any great coping skills to share?
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  • VaBluebirdVaBluebird 3365 replies239 threads Senior Member
    Sounds like the name of a movie.
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  • momofsenior1momofsenior1 7830 replies66 threads Senior Member
    @threebeans - My advice - keep expectations very low. Just expect the worst so anything even semi neutral will be an improvement. I also keep a running mantra that "this too shall pass" if things get really crummy.
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  • somemomsomemom 10878 replies325 threads Senior Member
    I had an in law who was pretty judgy and a good button pusher, I always had to remind myself that I do not respect his opinion, do not need his approval so not to defend myself and kids.
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  • Youdon'tsayYoudon'tsay 19276 replies459 threads Senior Member
    Next week, we will be meeting/eating/sharing an Airbnb what we expect will be ds1's in-laws one day. We are excited!!!
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  • momocarlymomocarly 928 replies11 threads Member
    I miss Thanksgiving with my in-laws (both died before my kids were born). They were so very nice! Lately we have gone to SIL's ranch every Thanksgiving and the kids so look forward to it. This year my D asked them when they would be there and they told her they weren't going to be there this year. No warning to us. Not very happy about this! Over 4th of July we were talking about how much we were looking forward to it now that they have a bigger Ranch with an outside building for us to stay in. They still haven't told us just her. We all get along so I don't understand why they didn't call and say "Sorry, we decided to make other plans ..."

    We do have a gender reveal with D's boyfriend's family right after Thanksgiving. I do not look forward to it at all. D and bf aren't getting along very well, his family is a mess and we have nothing in common with them at all!

    After Christmas we are taking S17 and his girfriend skiing at Sun Valley. She is wonderful and I'm looking forward to that trip! She would make a nice DIL but we will see! (They have been together 2 1/3 years so far)
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  • doschicosdoschicos 21574 replies226 threads Senior Member
    somemom wrote: »
    I had an in law who was pretty judgy and a good button pusher, I always had to remind myself that I do not respect his opinion, do not need his approval so not to defend myself and kids.

    Great suggestions here for coping but sometimes, in cases like the above, I think the best thing is to just call them out/talk to them about it in as much as an unemotional voice, Ms. Manners-ish voice as you can muster. Some people need to be told their behavior isn't acceptable.

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