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Please explain something to me. I have heard of many girls who just have to get into a specific sorority. I have even heard of one girl who didn't get into the sorority of choice at School A, so she actually transferred to School B for another shot at the same sorority (and got in.)
It seems like a sorority is made up of the girls who are at the school at the time. If Mom or Big Sister loved a particular sorority, isn't it because there was a great group of girls there at the time? As the membership changes from year to year, doesn't the personality of the chapter change, so it may be great one year and not great three years later? Or is it more like branches of the military, where people join a specific branch for certain traits?
Missypie, I also think the "right" sorority thing has a lot more to do with life after college. If mom, grandma, aunties and neighbors are all XYZ, a young lady grows up thinking XYZ is for her. The problem comes at schools like Alabama and Texas where every house could fill 4 pledge classes with legacies alone. That is what is happening now, which is why there are those dreaded phone calls. Houses are on to the transfer school concept and do not need to invite the transfer sister to affiliate with their house when she comes back as a sophomore. The girl is then left with alumnae status, meaning she is in for life, but would miss out on things like mixers and collegiate events.
It isn't just southern schools,however. I had friends that didthe same thing at IU 25 years ago when they had a bad recruitment. She came back and was unable to live in. If she had not dropped after she didn't get a "good" house, she would have had it all. In competitive schools there ARE no bad houses.
For the girls that were heartbroken by the process it's a very hard way to start college.
"When you join a sorority you join a national organization. A girl who joins a sorority is promising to be sisters with all the girls at any chapters of her sorority.... and all those who were and all those who will be."
I think that's kind of silly in practicality, though. I joined XYZ at a certain college; my younger sister went to a large state u where the XYZ's were, to put it charitably, not the brightest. They even had a death allegedly due to hazing. Why would I have wanted my sister to have been an XYZ there, and why would I considered myself "sisters" with these girls?
As for the alumnae clubs, I've done some activities with these clubs, and like anything, you like some people, are neutral towards others, and maybe even dislike a few. If I moved to a new city, I could certainly see joining an alumnae club as a way to meet people, but having all been XYZs in college would be just something we would have in common as a starting point, and pretty irrelevant to whether we would like one another / hit it off.
I am "sisters for life" with the girls in MY chapter. But I know them!
Just be careful with the "not every girl is placed." There is a difference between "I decided early on I wanted only to be an XYZ, so when the XYZ's didn't invite me back, even though the ABC's and DEF's did, I dropped out and was heartbroken" and "no one invited me back."
And if your initiation was anything like mine, you did agree to be "sisters for life" with all the women in the sorority, each and every single one. Maybe you crossed your fingers when you promised? Maybe you don't take any of this seriously?
pizzagirl: I start to understand why you want to distance your chapter from other chapters of your sorority