My 18yo lived on campus at a local university in the Fall, and did not do well without the guidance and supervision we gave him in high school. He has returned home, and will now commute to classes. While I recognize his disappointment in himself, and his irritation at living at home after experiencing freedom, we need to have some kind of agreement about his residing here. He has already created havoc in our home, just by being the unorganized, lots-of-large-projects, impulsive guy that he is. His younger siblings are annoyed that he is back - and frankly, so am I - but that's what we have to work with right now.
I want to have some kind of contract or agreement about what is expected of him to live in our house. Do any of you have experience with this? He is not in the same category as the younger ones, nor is he as much of an adult as he seems to think he is, regarding following the rules of the house. It is over an hour each way to commute on mass transit, and he argues that he needs a car in order to have enough time to study. He also can't study at home, so will be on campus most waking hours. I think having to commute is part of living with the consequences of having to leave his housing, and I don't want to let him use a car. (Not to mention that he is a careless driver.) But 3 hours a day on bus/train???
And with that kind of schedule, how much should we expect from him for helping out around here? He will do his own laundry, but he creates more mess than he cleans up in every room he goes into. (Yes, I should have trained him better long ago, and now I have to live with it.)
I am not sure what is fair and normal for a "housing contract." Any suggestions?