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Is private school worth it?
AnnieBeats
1940 replies18 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 1,958 Senior Member
My oldest kid is a senior who is going to take a gap year to do travel. My youngest is far from that stage. Only in 3rd grade. She does excellent in school, but I really dislike the public school she goes to. The facilities are dirty, some of the supplies are old and worn, and there are fights among the kids. I want to transfer her out of this hell hole to a better school. But the school of my choosing is way out of our zone. Should I consider a private school education? Is it really worth it to spend $25,000 a year on her education when that money could be saved for her to college? Hubby and I bring in about $300,000 per year and that may seem high, but we have a large home to take care (because he wanted to impress his parents) and several vehicles. So is private school worth it?
Will the quality of education really improve her chances of getting into a good college and being successful in life?
Are there any inherent differences between public schools and private schools?
Thanks parents for helping me out
149 replies Will the quality of education really improve her chances of getting into a good college and being successful in life?
Are there any inherent differences between public schools and private schools?
Thanks parents for helping me out
This discussion has been closed.
Replies to: Is private school worth it?
No one can tell you definitively if it's "worth it" to spend $25K on a primary/secondary education -- that's an absolutely personal choice based on many factors. It sounds like you could afford it, but the choice would require some significant changes in how you live/spend your money -- so I suppose the question could also be, is your child's education (and your peace of mind) worth making those changes. Again: it's a personal choice.
I do think that risking your ability to send your child to college because you spent a fortune on K-12 seems like a poor decision.
I could see starting in middle school, as those are years when growing pains are very real, and a pleasant environment with some good friends can really help. Also, the curriculum is beginning to be more challenging- at least it should- and study habits are learned during this time.
Why did we feel it was worth the cost for high school? The academics were much stronger in our private school, especially the writing instruction, which I feel is so very important no matter what your kids wind up doing professionally.
Socially, my kids also benefited from being with a cohort where academics were taken seriously. My Dd didn't have to hide whole parts of herself in order to fit in with the crowd. My son would have fit in anywhere, but he really appreciated that the students seemed to really respect one another, and their teachers. He would have been fine at the public, but he thrived at the private. The instructors were wonderful-and most had advanced degrees. Both of my kids are still very close to their high school buddies, even though they have both graduated college.
Not all privates are fabulous, and not all publics are sub-par, by any means. But for us, yes, the $20K a year for the four years for each (wow, that is a lot of money..) was definitely worth it.
Ideally you will sit down with hubby and lay out a budget that include home expenses, vehicle expenses (and replacement costs), living expenses, retirement planning, and college savings planning. And figure out how the tuition fits into that budget together. Otherwise in a few years he will be sniping about how you wanted your kid to go to a pricey private school, and you will be complaining about the expensive house and vehicles. And there will be no solid plan to pay for college and retirement.
$300K ought to be plenty to do all of those things IF you are thoughtful about it and on the same page with your spouse.
Not all privates are better than public schools. A well funded public often has more options for top students and students with LD. A Small and not so well funded private school tend to have fewer course offerings and not as many ECs. Some privates are also geared fqor students with behavior problems or simply to cater to wealthy families. Before you move your kid to any private school, do check out its curriculum, facility, faculty turn over rate and school profile to make sure it's a better school than your local public school.
One other thing to consider when sending your kid to a day school is there would be less of neighborhood school feeling because the school could draw students from long distance (20 to 30 miles). Your kid's best friend could live as far as 40 to 50 miles away. We used to spend a lot of time in driving our kids to school and to/from play dates and parties.
I have no children so I have nothing to contribute on that front. I personally went to a public Magnet school for middle and high school and the curriculum was great; I felt very prepared for college, especially with all of the AP classes I was required to take. I ended up getting accepted to some selective colleges and getting a full merit scholarship to a few mid-ranked (but still top 100) schools, and choosing one of those. I'm now doing a PhD at Columbia, so I'd say it worked out.
But having worked with undergrads at Columbia - many of whom went to fancy private schools for high school - I can see the stark differences in the opportunities they were afforded and the ones I had. Private school students are certainly overrepresented here. Part of that is more attributed to their families' wealth than the school, but a lot of times private schools with many wealthy parents have better resources that the parents can secure for the school. They also tend to attract better educated teachers and administrators. Their teachers typically all have MAs and PhDs. Many a colleague of mine (Ivy League and other top-tier PhD holders) has decided to teach at an independent high school rather than trying to get a professor position, because the positions are regarded as roughly similar in many ways.
However, there are also plenty of undergrads here at Columbia who went to public high schools!
I would also add if you send them to a good private that is known for students wanting to transfer to top 20 Uni's your child will be at a disadvantage compared to a more poorly run HS.
I disagree with this. Very good private schools send a large percentage of their students to top colleges.
Students who are better prepared tend to do better on the required tests and tend to write better essays. Students from private schools have the advantage that their teachers know them well and can write more personal, less generic, letters of recommendation. Students from better schools, public or private, have an advantage in the college admissions game.
One kind is public, and the other is private.
But that is irrelevant -- what matters is the quality and cost of the (public and private) schools available to you. Looks like the public school(s) available to you are unsatisfactory in your view. You need to determine if the private schools in available to you are better, and worth the added costs.
Spending to impress others is rarely cost effective. You could sell some of the vehicles, sell the house and buy a more suitable one, and have plenty of money left to pay for the private school. Or, if the new house is in the right place, you will have access to better public schools.
Think of it this way -- if, on $300,000 of income, spending $25,000 on private school for a kid is a financial stretch, that should be a warning to re-evaluate your spending habits. What if the kid wants to attend a $35,000 high school and $65,000 college later?
Also, I fully agree that we need to switch some things up regarding the house, but he is really stubborn. I've been running the idea by him for years and he won't budge. I guess I shouldn't have given in!
@juillet Do you feel like you would've gotten into a better school if you weren't in a public school? Or were there some opportunities you missed out on?
@oldfort Well, the goal is more so a better education (anything is better than what she has now) and I guess further down the line, it would be for a good college,