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Am I crazy not wanting my son living on campus?

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Replies to: Am I crazy not wanting my son living on campus?

  • twoinanddonetwoinanddone Registered User Posts: 20,545 Senior Member
    My D's friend had a single at her college because it was in her 504 plan and arranged with the disabilities office. However, she wanted to be part of a special community and there were no singles on the floor that this community lived in. She ended up living one floor up, but then wasn't really part of the core, and she did not go back to school the next year, now lives at home and commutes. I don't know that living in a double in the learning community would have solved her problems, but it was just one more area she didn't fit in.

    This girl had been attending camp for many years so clearly COULD live with others but felt she needed a single at school.
  • lostaccountlostaccount Registered User Posts: 5,153 Senior Member
    Library...that quiet place that is conducive to studying. Students who live off campus, even if they are familiar with the town because they grew up there, often have a very tough time socially. You would be doing your son a favor by being positive and optimistic about his living in the dorm. And, because he will be home sick and lonely (as many new students are) for the first couple of weeks, the more you can encourage him to stay in the dorms and to get used to the new living situation, the better off your son will be. I bet he ends up happy in the dorms.
  • PizzagirlPizzagirl Registered User Posts: 40,488 Senior Member
    edited September 2015
    Both my newly launched kids have roommates in their first apartments - and not friends, just people they met for the purpose of sharing an apt This keeps rent manageable for them, esp my one kid in a big city. You don't want your kid so terrified of a roommate that he couldn't room with someone in a first apartment or in a summer program. I get preferring not to but there is a diff between preferring not to and being frazzled by or unable to.

    He's probably going to not have a private office, either, in his first job.
  • Irishmomof2Irishmomof2 Registered User Posts: 963 Member
    I grew up in a family of 7 - we had one bathroom, and I shared a bedroom with 3 sisters (only one boy, guess who got his own room?)

    It's good to experience different things!
  • Tonia39Tonia39 Registered User Posts: 6 New Member
    Wonderful news! Panic for nothing -- I just heard back from the housing office at NKU and because of the credit hours he will already have earned before he gets there, both he and his friend will be considered sophomores and exempt from the residency requirement.

    To everyone who had helpful and supportive suggestions, thank you! Mr. Who Moved my Cheese functions quite well in his day to day interactions at school, in band activities, and at his part-time job. But he doesn't have to bring all of those co-workers or classmates home with him to sleep in a bunk bed and share a shower! Nice to know he has the option of choosing not to live in a dorm. He could get a wild hair and go for it, but that is totally up to him.
  • SnowdogSnowdog Registered User Posts: 2,243 Senior Member
    edited September 2015
    Your son sounds like mine....needs alone time to recharge, modest and quiet, doesn't do well with a lot of stimulation. - classic introvert. He is doing very well (with a lot of advance preparation) living in a single room on campus. He had anxiety about the bathroom situation but it has worked out okay. Again with preparation, the right supplies, managing expectations. He has grown a lot in one month living in the dorm.

    Edited to add - I see you've worked it out. I'll just say, I was as anxious as my son about him moving out from under my care and protection and encouraged him to attend our local commuter university. But I let him decide and he's succeeded so far beyond both our expectations.
  • ucbalumnusucbalumnus Registered User Posts: 74,401 Senior Member
    Tonia39 wrote:
    Wonderful news! Panic for nothing -- I just heard back from the housing office at NKU and because of the credit hours he will already have earned before he gets there, both he and his friend will be considered sophomores and exempt from the residency requirement.

    It may have been a panic for nothing anyway, if you live in one of the exempt counties listed in
    https://housing.nku.edu/content/dam/housing/docs/Apply Here/First Year Student Residency Requirement.pdf
  • brantlybrantly Registered User Posts: 3,534 Senior Member
    edited September 2015
    Just a general question. What do people like Tonia39's son do when they get a job and are assigned to sit in a cubicle in an open-floor-plan office, and the co-worker in the adjacent cubicle eats lunch at his desk loudly and the other co-worker across the way talks loudly on the phone and another adjacent co-worker clears his throat frequently?
  • Madison85Madison85 Registered User Posts: 10,647 Senior Member
    Who Moved My Cheese?
  • SnowdogSnowdog Registered User Posts: 2,243 Senior Member
    @brantly, if you had a special needs type of kid you wouldn't be quite so flip. These are questions that parents of kids with LDs and other disabilities, like the OP, ask ourselves all the time. I get where the OP is coming from. We made a different choice and so far it has worked out. But it doesn't mean her child will never, ever, become a functional adult, which is what your question seems to suggest.
This discussion has been closed.