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Do you check your kids grade in college?

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Replies to: Do you check your kids grade in college?

  • HoggirlHoggirl 1578 replies193 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 1,771 Senior Member
    @turtle0099 - I would just think by the time a child becomes an adult such as yourself, parents would stop being so concerned with grades. You clearly had academic success in college. I can understand them asking in general how you are doing academically, but checking a med school grade portal and making you sign a waiver just seems - idk - disrespectful to me, even if they are footing the bill. Displays a lack of trust/confidence in you. Sorry. I am being judge-y. It's really not any of my business how your family dynamics work.
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  • HoggirlHoggirl 1578 replies193 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 1,771 Senior Member
    @Spaceship - I'm glad you have a relationship with your grandmother and dad. As someone who lost both parents at the age of 24, it just hurts my heart when there is family strife.
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  • MaterSMaterS 1807 replies51 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 1,858 Senior Member
    The guest portal where I pay tuition has access to the grades. But if the grade is going to be lower than an A- I usually hear about it before final grades are posted.
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  • partyof5partyof5 2549 replies125 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 2,674 Senior Member
    @Marian thats not true. We get two discounts, one for distance and one for good grades.
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  • m0minmdm0minmd 282 replies11 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 293 Junior Member
    With DD, she usually kept us in the loop with how a class was going. When the chatter stopped, that was the sign that things were going south/went south. Not much we could do but tell her to get with her advisor, go to the help center, find someone who could give her assistance. She usually did one of those and turned it around. This was like this in high school and in college. We knew her rhythm and what to expect. Had her portal PW and nosed around once or twice in the 4 years. Nothing shocking.

    With DS, he doesn't offer anything unless we ask. This is his way in HS. I have no reason to think that'll change now. We'll ask for his PW in the fall (or however they do it). We'll nose around once or twice at some point. I'll be shocked if I am shocked.

    Both know/knew that we parents have paid for the PW. Even if we (almost) never use it.

    (Based on experience with an older sibling, my parents required the physical mailed grades after each semester. No verbal assurances.)
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  • romanigypsyeyesromanigypsyeyes 33171 replies767 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 33,938 Senior Member
    @garland I assumed that people meant the portals with the final grades and all that. I'd be bothered if I knew parents were accessing our Canvas site because that's for students, not parents. IMO, there is absolutely no reason for a parent to be on the actual course site.
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  • socalmom3socalmom3 39 replies3 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 42 Junior Member
    I have access to my daughters portal and sometimes I check, sometimes I don't. She seems more worried about grades than I. However, my niece's parents did not ever check her grades (they weren't really involved in any of the college process) and she failed a class and didn't tell them. I knew about it and have been working closely with her to stay on top of grades - I have her send me transcripts each semester. I think she appreciates somebody paying attention to how she's doing.
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  • garlandgarland 15894 replies198 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 16,092 Senior Member
    @romanigypsyeyes, this post sounds like someone seeing the Canvas or similar type site:
    Yep I've got the online portal user id and password and I periodically get on and check. Trouble is this semester only 2 classes are using the online portal. DD seems to always think she is doing fine. She's an engineering major and most of her classes have curves. I try not to freak out until the curve is taken into consideration at final grade time because it does make a difference.

    I think that's definitely over intrusive.
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  • romanigypsyeyesromanigypsyeyes 33171 replies767 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 33,938 Senior Member
    ^I agree. Completely missed that post.
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  • SeeksKnowledgeSeeksKnowledge 179 replies22 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 201 Junior Member
    Hey that's me ^ and when I get on her portal it lists all her classes and when can select grades and only 2 classes list grades. That's all I meant, I have no clue what goes on in her classes just checking the grade tab and there is nothing there. Not intrusive at all, its how it has to be done.
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  • garlandgarland 15894 replies198 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 16,092 Senior Member
    ^Well, it sounds like you're checking grades during the semester, not just the final grade. Maybe I'm misunderstanding, but that seems to be what you're saying.
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  • Dave_NDave_N 801 replies15 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 816 Member
    With DS '17, we don't check and he has been fairly open. He says he doing "fine" which has always in the past meant "extremely well". To date, we haven't seen a "report card", official transcript or portal print out.

    The only grade we used to ask specifically about was his drawing class because it was such a stretch for him. (His college requires an "artistic production" gen-ed.) He took it pass/fail. He reported that he did "fine". My DD '20 used to make him show his sketchbook each on the skype sessions for fun.

    I have helicopter tendencies, but college, for me, was the time to let go.

    Let's see if I can stick to this philosophy when it's time for GREs/grad school apps. I predict I will give more advice than wanted, some of which he will listen to and some of which he will not.

    I just hope everything continues to be "fine".

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  • marybee333marybee333 746 replies20 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 766 Member
    I personally do not have to ask. My student likes to share success and challenges, and "crazy professor" stories! I have a pretty good idea of how they are doing and have never checked and have no access to check anyway. But if you have a student that is not applying themselves, partying, gaming and is risking scholarship money and/or at risk of flunking out, I might be on top of it more, IF I am paying for their tuition. No sense in throwing money out the window. So I guess it depends on many factors.
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  • happy1happy1 22466 replies2195 discussionsForum Champion Parents, Forum Champion Admissions Posts: 24,661 Forum Champion
    edited April 2016
    Both of my kids have shared their grades with me every semester. Maybe they know I would have asked if they didn't tell me on their own....lol! For what H and I pay for college, I think we deserve to know how things are going and that they are on track to graduate on time. Both of my kids are (thankfully) hard working serious students, so when there are blips, I find that I end up consoling them/reminding them it is OK to not be perfect.
    edited April 2016
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