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Racist comments from a male senior, what should we do?

kchenddskchendds 264 replies42 threads Member
edited May 2016 in Parents Forum
Daughter just texted me about a friend said something really mean to her and she is extremely upset. The guy is known for racist for a while.

"XX just told me that he hopes that Trump will deport me and I should go back to my country"

Should we report it and take actions or just drop it? Both students are top students and both are going to different top LAC. They are both very intelligent and obviously it is not just a casual joke if my daughter has such reaction. My husband is furious about this for some reason and I am not mad.

What is your opinion on this?
edited May 2016
247 replies
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Replies to: Racist comments from a male senior, what should we do?

  • kchenddskchendds 264 replies42 threads Member
    edited May 2016
    @ucbalumnus He has said things in class but he never personally attacked someone like this as far as we know.
    edited May 2016
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  • PNWedwonkPNWedwonk 451 replies24 threads Member
    You said he was a "friend." Is that true? If so, she needs to talk to him very directly and say that what he said was hurtful and inappropriate. He needs to know that he is being an idiot.
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  • ucbalumnusucbalumnus 78529 replies695 threads Senior Member
    Would it be correct to assume that overt racism is socially acceptable in this high school and community?
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  • kchenddskchendds 264 replies42 threads Member
    @PNWedwonk they are kind of friends because they are in many classes together. She has brought it up many times and he said he is not a racist. He denies it. He once said he hates all Hispanics but he claimed himself one and got some scholarship.
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  • mom23travelersmom23travelers 478 replies9 threads Member
    Something very similar to this happened at the elementary school I work at. The parent was called and the student sent home for the rest of the day.

    I would follow your daughter's lead on this. If she wants to make an issue of it, support her. If she doesn't, let it go. Help her think through the possible consequences of those choices.
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  • kchenddskchendds 264 replies42 threads Member
    @ucbalumnus That's why I am not affected but husband is really upset and he wants to let the top LAC know they are taking a kid with this mentality. I am not from this country originally and that's why I am not sure what is correct to say and what's not in hs.
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  • Youdon'tsayYoudon'tsay 19244 replies459 threads Senior Member
    Did he say this in class in front of a teacher?
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  • kchenddskchendds 264 replies42 threads Member
    @ucbalumnus He's only 1/4 Hispanic I guess or less. He's a hypocrite.
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  • kchenddskchendds 264 replies42 threads Member
    @Youdon'tsay I think he just said it to her
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  • kchenddskchendds 264 replies42 threads Member
    edited May 2016
    @albert69 I am from Hong Kong and my husband was born in the USA. My child is citizen by naturalization because she was born in Hong Kong
    edited May 2016
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  • oldmom4896oldmom4896 3897 replies291 threads Senior Member
    albert69, I assume you are male? You might feel differently about the guy you know if you were female.
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  • HarvestMoon1HarvestMoon1 6200 replies28 threads Senior Member
    I think your H's suggestion of contacting the LAC is a bit over the top. Perhaps this person made the comment in jest - although I agree it is not humorous. Lot's of "joksters" out there making inappropriate political comments in the name of Trump. If the comment upset your D I would suggest to her that she report it to the appropriate person at her high school.
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  • slk1022slk1022 59 replies2 threads Junior Member
    I would tell him how his comments hurt your feelings, and ask for a sincere apology. Absent an apology, tell him you plan to send a letter to his future school. This type of thing falls into "he said/she said," but now schools have systems in place to collect anonymous reports of racism, sexual assault, etc. So if his behavior continues (and it will if no one ever stands up to him), the school will be more likely to believe the next person that complains.

    Honestly, I hope you scare him enough, get the apology you deserve, and teach him a life-long lesson.

    Good luck!
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  • kchenddskchendds 264 replies42 threads Member
    @awcntdb I think you misunderstood the whole thing. First my daughter is against Trump and not actively against Trump. She doesn't do anything in public to voice herself. She told us. She is actively involved in politics by reading articles and following the news. She will not go all out to say things to hurt people to get her point. And this guy just said something hurtful by attacking another person. I think it is very different.

    You are right and I think she is hurt probably she sees him as a friend but I am sure it is only 20% of it by knowing my daughter.
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