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My Mom thinks I ruined my life

mocktrialer5mocktrialer5 Registered User Posts: 59 Junior Member
Hi guys, I know lots of people are going to think I am being ridiculous or that my mom is being crazy but I just need to get this out of my system. Recently, my mom and I realized that the books I ordered for SAT practice didn't show up because I didn't actually order them. The SAT is on Aug 26 and I have to admit I haven't been studying much for it. I took the SAT last September and got a 1470. Then I took the ACT in February and got a 34. Lots of people have told me that it is ridiculous for me to be taking the SAT again. But for a time I wanted to go to UPenn ED and my mom told me that because of my terribly low GPA of a 92 or 3.79 on a standard 4.0 scale, I needed something to help me stand out and the SAT would do that. Now, my mom is saying because of my lack of effort, I have to cancel the SAT and not take it. She is refusing to spend my college money on any non-top tier schools unless I get significant merit aid. She wants me to go to my state school or community college which is UNM and CNM. My mom is talking to my dad and saying she is super depressed and about to cry because i have ruined my life. I don't really expect any replies but I just needed to get this off my chest. Thank you

Replies to: My Mom thinks I ruined my life

  • bodanglesbodangles Registered User Posts: 8,352 Senior Member
    The SAT will not help you stand out. Plenty of people get high scores (like your very good 34 on the ACT -- I really don't see a point in trying the SAT when you've already got a good ACT).

    Can you clarify what kind of schools she won't pay for? You said she won't pay for "non-top tier schools" but she also wants you to go to a state school?

    Don't take her comments to heart. Saying you have ruined your life by not studying for a test you shouldn't be taking is not grounded in any kind of logic. Stick around this thread for a bit and we'll see if the users here can maybe help you formulate a list of universities you can a) get into and b) afford.
  • mocktrialer5mocktrialer5 Registered User Posts: 59 Junior Member
    @DadTwoGirls would it be wise for me to send just my ACT or do most colleges want to see both
  • AroundHereAroundHere Registered User Posts: 2,572 Senior Member
    You can download all the practice tests in the official SAT book from Khan Academy at Satpractice.org

    The book just saves you the trouble of printing them yourself
  • ConcernedRabbitConcernedRabbit Registered User Posts: 462 Member
    edited August 9
    I would just send the ACT. It's in range, and your GPA is not awful...

    I think you are in the same situation as a lot of people where it going to either be a lucky shot at a reach or a retreat to a safety. I don't think you've ruined your life, but I do believe that you may need to be more motivated than you currently are. It sounds like your mom is pushing you to reach your dream of UPenn ED more than you are pushing yourself.
  • happy1happy1 Registered User Posts: 18,536 Senior Member
    edited August 9
    Agree that in and of themselves standardized tests won't make you stand out. Schools like UPenn turn down plenty of applicants with perfect SAT/ACT scores and accept others with your current ACT score. With under a 10% acceptance rate, Penn (even ED) is unlikely for everyone, even a legacy. Here are some other things to consider: Have you taken SAT subject tests and done well? Do you have any ECs that will make you stand out? Have you worked to craft an outstanding essay? Will you get amazing letters of recommendation?

    At this point you can spend the next 2 weeks studying to satisfy your mom but when the time comes apply to a group of reach, match and safety schools that appear affordable and that you would be happy to attend. You may want to seek out schools where you would qualify for merit aid -- as a start you can look through this list of merit scholarships (probably needs to be updated) http://automaticfulltuition.yolasite.com/

    FWIW I graduated from Penn and my kid's didn't even apply to Penn yet they both had absolutely amazing undergrad experiences! Getting into any one school will not make or break your life.
  • mocktrialer5mocktrialer5 Registered User Posts: 59 Junior Member
    Everyone she is now saying that she will not pay for me even if I get into my top choices which are UPenn, Duke, Cornell, Swarthmore, and Haverford. She says my only options are to get great merit scholarships to lower schools or go to my state school/ community college. I don't know what to tell her @Lindagaf @happy1 @ConcernedRabbit @bodangles
  • happy1happy1 Registered User Posts: 18,536 Senior Member
    edited August 9
    Have a non-emotional conversation, get a handle on what your parents will pay for your college and go from there. For example if they will pay for your state school then seek out places where you can qualify for aid to fill the gap. Many people in this process are limited by finances. Check out your state school to see if there is an honors program you might qualify for.
  • austinmshauriaustinmshauri Registered User Posts: 5,878 Senior Member
    Is it possible your mom just doesn't want to pay? What is your dad saying?

    Do you have a ballpark idea of your family's income? I think if your mom is going to behave irrationally, you need to have a plan in case they won't pay. What state are you in? Is your state school within commuting distance? You can only borrow ~$5500/year on your own, so without merit aid or need based grants you can't afford redsidential college if your parents won't help pay.
  • bjkmombjkmom Registered User Posts: 4,678 Senior Member
    edited August 9
    oops, didn't mean to,posr
  • mocktrialer5mocktrialer5 Registered User Posts: 59 Junior Member
    @austinmshauri I have enough money in my college savings to pay for full four year undergrad at any school, but my mom doesn't think I deserve the money
  • austinmshauriaustinmshauri Registered User Posts: 5,878 Senior Member
    Whose name is the account in? If you don't own the account, you won't have access to it.
  • mocktrialer5mocktrialer5 Registered User Posts: 59 Junior Member
    edited August 11
    It is my parents account @austinmshauri
    Post edited by sybbie719 on
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