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A Student Rebelling


Replies to: A Student Rebelling

  • SJ2727SJ2727 Registered User Posts: 1,556 Senior Member
    edited November 2018
    A word of caution, even with superscoring, be careful of too many tests. While most of the colleges our D has applied to ask for highest score, and some super score, we also had college info sessions where they mentioned wanting all test scores and/or being wary of people taking the same test (ACT or SAT) more than twice.

    From your last post it does sound like it might be pressure. When you say she has “1-2 hours a day” to spare, despite a rigorous schedule and ECs, is that still with having enough time just to chill and relax a bit after school?
  • holychildholychild Registered User Posts: 68 Junior Member
    Happymomof1. I know he wants the absolute best for her but I agree with you regarding the “hyper focused “. It’s just so difficult to deal with. I am constantly in the middle of the two of them. He doesn’t listen to me when I suggest he adjust his expectations. It’s either his way or the highway. He disengages and tells me I have to do everything.
  • evergreen5evergreen5 Registered User Posts: 1,364 Senior Member
    edited November 2018
    It sounds like a pressure/stress thing - we had this in our house. I don't have a great answer for that other than to explore the types of college options that may be more likely at various score levels.

    It sounds like you all sense a difference between her school performance and her current ACT score. Some kids do much better on SAT than ACT or vice versa. I would lay off for now, but I'd also make a plan to have her prep with the tutor for the SAT, taking it in the spring and possibly again in Aug/Oct, if SAT turns out to be a better test for her. Ideally the better-fitting test could be determined by taking a practice test at home, but this kid sounds like the type to refuse that option.

    Sometimes the tutoring may be the best you can do to get even a little bit of prep to help keep her options open. Her perspective may change a lot between now and next fall when she may be more motivated.
  • holychildholychild Registered User Posts: 68 Junior Member
    Thank you all so much for your insightful comments.
  • thumper1thumper1 Registered User Posts: 75,605 Senior Member
    You are in NY? There are many SUNY options.

    Do not force her to take that February test. What is the point?
  • thumper1thumper1 Registered User Posts: 75,605 Senior Member
    edited November 2018
    If you and dad are at cross purposes, perhaps some counseling for you two might be helpful.

    Creating unnecessary stress is not ever good.
  • jonsmom23jonsmom23 Registered User Posts: 23 Junior Member
    Both my D17 and S19 say junior year is the worst, with the most pressure.

    My S19 didn't even think about the ACT until after Christmas last year, started ACT tutoring this past January, took his first official test in February, and continued with the tutoring until the April test date. We were all happy with that April score, and then he had to switch to AP test prep and finals mode. The boy was exhausted. He thought about taking the ACT again in June but didn't have it in him to refocus. Some of his friends were still taking the test up until October I think.

    Give her time.

  • techmom99techmom99 Registered User Posts: 3,336 Senior Member
    My S17 got into a SUNY with a 27 ACT and even got into the honors program at his school.
  • LindagafLindagaf Registered User Posts: 9,077 Senior Member
    It doesn't matter if it's already paid for. She doesn't HAVE to take it that day.
  • compmomcompmom Registered User Posts: 10,500 Senior Member
    Many schools,including top schools, are test -optional or don't emphasize tests in admissions. With her grades and EC's your daughter should have many options.


    Please look carefully at this list and consider the possibility that she does not have to submit test scores to get into a good school.

    Only caveat: for merit aid, often test scores are needed. For financial aid, they are not.
  • atanvarneatanvarne Registered User Posts: 80 Junior Member
    Both of my kids were terrible test-takers, never got scores that even remotely reflected their abilities. Multiple sittings and prep classes just made the situation worse. So we went seeking test-optional schools and found that there are PLENTY of them. So don't agonize, some students simply will never test well and that's OK. More and more schools are recognizing that SAT and ACT scores only tell them one thing about the students--how well they perform on standardized tests.

    My younger dd is a senior hi HS now and just submitted the Common App to 6 schools, all but one of them test-optional. Go looking, you will find them.
  • roycroftmomroycroftmom Registered User Posts: 2,384 Senior Member
    The score may or may not improve with further test prep. What certainly won't improve, though, is your relationship with your daughter if you force this upon her. She will be the one to deal with the consequences of her score (which is fine for most schools). The potential damage to your relationship will be felt by all of you.
  • intparentintparent Registered User Posts: 36,708 Senior Member
    So let him disengage (if he really will), You and your D can do it. It might be best.
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