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Having a car at college ...


Replies to: Having a car at college ...

  • toomanyteenstoomanyteens Registered User Posts: 1,006 Senior Member
    @Sybylla yeah I am not into that kind of monitoring at all
  • toomanyteenstoomanyteens Registered User Posts: 1,006 Senior Member
    @Massmomm its an odd thing, the boyfriend is very anti social with us -- I invite him regularly, and yes she is close enough to come home once in a while. On Easter weekend, I invited him 3 times, each time he declined and they went off to his mother's house. I don't care for him because he isolates her and that is not good for HER. BUT my main concern right now is her studies and her staying focused. The rest is what it is.
  • toomanyteenstoomanyteens Registered User Posts: 1,006 Senior Member
    @TexasCollegeMom Yes she does have a GPA to maintain -- and so far she is doing very well and I just want (for her sake) for that to continue. @mommdc you are right - she seems to be dedicated and passionate about it but I am a mom so I still worry.
  • natty1988natty1988 Registered User Posts: 459 Member
    My D did not take her car to college (actually it was H and I's car that we let her drive). Not having a car didn't seem to hinder her at all. The car was used by S when he got his license. When D moved home after college she and S split use of the car. We sold the car to D when she got her first job. And S got use of my old car. He will not take his car to college. When he gets his first job, we will sell the car to him. We told our kids if they want to take their cars to college, they will have to pay for the registration, gas, and maintenance.
  • natty1988natty1988 Registered User Posts: 459 Member
    edited May 9
    @toomanyteens who actually has ownership of the car and pays for the registration, gas, insurance, maintenance? Is her name on the title? If you actually own the car, then you do have more of a say over how it is used, etc. I do think it's reasonable to ask her to shoulder some of the costs...

    You could pay for the gas for driving to her clinicals and to and from school on vacations. And if she wants to use her car for visiting her boyfriend, she needs to pay for that...
  • twocollegekidstwocollegekids Registered User Posts: 118 Junior Member
    All you can do is watch closely. I assume your DD is coming home for the summer. Will she be working? Hopefully, the BF is also working. Does he have any plans going forward?
  • twoinanddonetwoinanddone Registered User Posts: 21,424 Senior Member
    My kids knew when I said something if I really meant it, and this would be one of those times. Things I really meant - no cell phones while driving, no skipping classes (that had always been our rule so it was more of a habit), no tattoos. They knew when I said no 'wasting' money on pizza because it was already paid for as part of the meal plan was me being unrealistic (but I bet they thought about it every time they had to pay for pizza).

    On the car they'd know I was serious. Neither had a car at school, but as soon as my daughter got her own car that she's paying for, she didn't want anyone else driving it so that became her 'rule' and I'm not sure she didn't claim that it was my rule. I'm good with her using me.

    Just be firm and then pray.
  • toomanyteenstoomanyteens Registered User Posts: 1,006 Senior Member
    @natty1988 yes we do have a say you are right as we pay the expenses and I do intend to only finance what she 'needs' for gas etc. not for the side trips.
  • toomanyteenstoomanyteens Registered User Posts: 1,006 Senior Member
    @twocollegekids yes she is working in the summer -- there is no doubt about that. I don't have trouble getting her to work, she likes having money lol. The boyfriend well, he tends to not work. As a matter of fact, one of the things I dislike about him is that SHE was footing the bill for him for a long time, and she was even paying his CAR insurance at one point -- she is empathetic and he seems to figure out how to push that button. He has all kinds of excuses disguised as legitimate reasons to not have a job, for losing a job, for not getting another job (geeze why don't we LIKE him?) -- I don't know what his plans are after graduation.

    My ex (her father), my husband, her sisters and I agree on him (and believe me ex and I do NOT agree on much) and we are on the same side with this car thing -- he bought the car, I will be insuring and maintaining it.
  • TQfromtheUTQfromtheU Registered User Posts: 1,490 Senior Member
    Sometimes it takes the friends pointing out that the BF is going nowhere for it to stick. Years ago, a friend compared her slacker taker longtime BF to the husbands her friends had. They told her other guys were interested in her but they could not introduce her because of Mr. Slacker. She thought about it, decided she didn't see or want a future with him, with her pulling all the weight. She dumped him, was set up on a date with a guy suited to her. They have been married for about 20yrs, 2 kiddos, great partnership marriage.
  • toomanyteenstoomanyteens Registered User Posts: 1,006 Senior Member
    @Massmomm me too, and I am not sure what I can actually do about it
  • toomanyteenstoomanyteens Registered User Posts: 1,006 Senior Member
    @TQfromtheU I keep hoping for that to happen
  • compmomcompmom Registered User Posts: 10,500 Senior Member
    I can't believe that a car is required for clinicals. I would think schools would accommodate students who cannot afford a car. One of mine is getting a doctorate in So. CA and cannot afford a car. He gets around via bus and Uber.

    Separate issue, I know, but I don't agree with any school assuming a student can afford a car.
  • MaterSMaterS Registered User Posts: 1,820 Senior Member
    I agree with @compmom Does the school subsidize Zipcar?
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