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How much are you involved with your high schooler in their homework

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Replies to: How much are you involved with your high schooler in their homework

  • momofthreeboysmomofthreeboys Registered User Posts: 16,649 Senior Member
    Only when they asked.
  • Happytimes2001Happytimes2001 Registered User Posts: 1,217 Senior Member
    Never involved never have been since grade 1. Have always ensured the kids get to school on time, have the supplies they need. I buy books and will take them to the library. On very rare occasions, I am asked to edit written material ( very rarely and I do edit but I don't rewrite-that's cheating). My kids are excellent students (one has an A+ average). The expectation has always been if you need help you ask the teacher or parent or someone who can help.

    With kids now in private schools, I carefully review all classes which will be taken the year before. And we discuss an overall plan or will talk about taking one class versus another. I would never meet with a teacher without my kids unless it is the annual check in. I do occasionally end up in the online systems (usually to pay a bill or for scheduling info) and will sometimes browse the assignments ( have done this maybe 2-3 times each year per kid).
    Also, I hold several degrees so my kids will often bounce ideas for papers or deeper studies off me. I'm happy to consent but don't do the work. Admittedly, I recently helped a lot on a sonnet. Kiddo was looking for a rhyming word. I also read ten pages of Shakespeare for the same kid back in September. ( Kid hates English poetry, I get that). Kid still fell asleep.

    My own personal belief is parents helping kids goes no where fast. I have friends who have done their kids schools projects for years. The kids aren't particularly good students as they are not accountable.
  • MeddyMeddy Registered User Posts: 474 Member
    edited May 14
    Not at all over here. Our girls have asked us to read through things, but I honestly think that it is when they are really quite proud of their work and would like to show us. Why do I think this? One reason is when they finally send it to us there isn't enough time for us to offer any bit of feedback before turning it in. Like, "I'm sharing it with you and it's due at 2pm." At 1:59 pm we're still not seeing anything in the inbox. lol!

  • frostymomfrostymom Registered User Posts: 2 New Member
    None in high school and very little when the kids are in middle school. I will quiz my middle schooler on vocab etc when he asks in preparation for a test, but that's about it.

    That is not to say that I would not help my highschooler if she asked me and was having difficulty with something specific but she does all her planning, studying and homework independently,
  • chb088chb088 Registered User Posts: 890 Member
    Not at all. None.
  • LuvsLabsLuvsLabs Registered User Posts: 268 Junior Member
    edited May 14
    Not at all. (other than making it crystal clear that I don't want to hear from their teachers that they're not doing their homework, of course.
  • privatebankerprivatebanker Registered User Posts: 4,541 Senior Member
    How could I help her if I couldn’t answer one question. Lol.

    My problem was making sure she got enough rest and didn’t stress out too much. Tough on both counts.
  • momtogirls2momtogirls2 Registered User Posts: 707 Member
    I will help out if needed. My daughters know they can run something by me, ask me to quiz them on facts, and ask me to proofread etc. I can't guarantee I can always help but it doesn't bother me to quiz on vocab for a test if asked. My oldest liked that but my youngest hates to be quizzed. Mainly because it is easy for my husband, he has no issues going over math and showing how to do a math problem if needed. Sometimes the 1 on 1 for a problem or two is all that is needed to grasp the concept. These are all on a as needed basis which is far from a regular thing.
  • 3js3ks3js3ks Registered User Posts: 311 Member
    Just enough to ask if they have any, and then a little prodding to get them off their phones. I did have to involve myself in my freshman's earth science homework the first semester. It was a ball breaking class with new curriculum that even I found difficult so it was a family affair to get through the assignments! My kids are all better at math than I ever was, so I consider them brilliant and me blessed!
  • KnowsstuffKnowsstuff Registered User Posts: 2,926 Senior Member
    Love all the responses to the parents of super kids.. Lol..

    We helped when asked but each of our kids are so different. My son wanted help with self testing on vocabulary tests and I would say "spell this" "Or what's the meaning of this word". Sometimes making cards to test himself just got old. My daughter would want help on memorizing her lines in a play and went to a high school for performing arts and also once in awhile help quizzing for a test. But I loved doing this with them and watching them grow.

    Monitoring grades absolutely! Like no one here looked at report cards or had parent /teacher conferences??? 🤔.

    If my son got a "C" in anything or close to that, that would be a huge signal that something was drastically wrong. For my daughter, not so much. Know thy child.

    We just made sure that their homework was done by asking.. What ya studying today? I was actually interested. They both had some issues of doing homework and putting it their locker and never making to the teacher. So yes, that needed to be corrected but by them not me,when they were younger.

    I think you have to do what's right for your child and your situation. If not working up to their potential then I believe you need to intervene. Funny thing is now my daughter is in college and getting only top grades and has been on Dean's list for all years and my son is doing great but in a hard engineering program at a top university where getting a 65 % is actually a really good grade... Lol... 🙂.

    Please take this with tongue in cheek where applicable... 😊.

    So to all that said they have not intervened since like second grade.... So my daughter when in first grade like didn't talk for 3 months in class but no one ever said anything to us. But she came home telling us everything that went on each day with excitement. Finally her teacher called us in for a "meeting". She told us she thought there was a severe learning problem and was shocked to hear that we knew everything that was going on in class. We told the teacher she absorbs everything. So we told our daughter that she needs to talk in class to show the teacher she is learning. She said the teacher never asked her to so just stayed silent. She said she would show the teacher she is smart. So literally like the next day we get a call from the teacher asking how to make her stop talking... Lol.. 😎.




  • whidbeyite2002whidbeyite2002 Registered User Posts: 137 Junior Member
    (Almost) not at all. My daughter occasionally asks me to read through a paper. And she knows I’ve forgotten just about all of calculus.
  • VickiSoCalVickiSoCal Registered User Posts: 3,261 Senior Member
    My kids go/went to a large public high school
    There are no PT conferences. If you don't go to the single back to school night each year and spend 10 minutes sitting in each classroom you will never meet the teachers. Not sure I would really call that meeting them with 30 parents in each roo..

    I chuckle at @LuvsLabs suggestion that the teacher might let parents know honework is not getting done. Only way to know that is to check the portal or wait for bad report card.
  • brantlybrantly Registered User Posts: 3,659 Senior Member
    My dc go/went to a small public HS, and there are no parent-teacher conferences. Those ended after fifth grade. Do any high schools have them?
  • NJWrestlingmomNJWrestlingmom Registered User Posts: 943 Member
    We were involved with S, not really at all with D, unless she asks for us to read something over. Occasionally she asks hubby for chem help (he's a science teacher). With S, we were in face constantly or else he wouldn't do the assignments! Or - my personal favorite - do them and forget to hand them in. It got better over the years, but we had to stay on top of him. Checked the portal like a fiend!!
  • VickiSoCalVickiSoCal Registered User Posts: 3,261 Senior Member
    @NJWrestlingmom Do them and forget to turn them in, or lose them in the bottom of the backpack, or forget to write name on them....
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