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Convincing our son to go to the state flagship

CC AdminCC Admin 29516 replies2979 postsAdministrator Senior Member
This discussion was created from comments split from: Discovering Affordability.
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Replies to: Convincing our son to go to the state flagship

  • cypresspatcypresspat 240 replies7 postsRegistered User Junior Member
    @MYOS1634 Sigh.... I have tried. Any school which has the major he wants where he could get merit $ compares unfavorably to OSU on what matters to him. Cost wise, it can’t be beat; he won’t get a full scholarship anywhere. And the research programs and hence the scientific firepower of the chem engineering professors (and he knows he will likely never be in the same room as those guys and gals) pretty much squash every other school. Except Cornell and UCLA. He is willing to accept the relative slight inferiority ofnthe chem eng depts. in the other schools he is looking at because they have something else he likes (usually the ability to do a minor he is considering).
    And he shuns co-ops. He wants to graduate on-time. He’ll be all over summer internships, but the school year is for school, according to my 17 year old.
    He is not making this easy.
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  • MYOS1634MYOS1634 41551 replies447 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    For that major, have OU looked at UDel and UMN TC?
    He could apply and compare, + Cornell (UCLA is going to be private price/public university. Great for Californians whoboay instate rates, not for OOS).
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  • thumper1thumper1 73755 replies3215 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    @cypresspat

    The Ohio State University is a terrific flagship university...with tons of majors if he changes his mind. His is a win win...a great flagship...really great...at a very affordable cost. And he loves the school according to your other thread.
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  • cptofthehousecptofthehouse 28768 replies56 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    edited July 17
    I agree that OP’s son not giving up much going to OSU. I know many many talented kids who have gone there.
    edited July 17
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  • maya54maya54 2077 replies87 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    It seems like you really really really are not willing to pay more than OSU. You’ve said about your kid that “being a pretty self-less and easy-to-please kid, would never ask his parents to spend $200K more for something just because he likes it better. It would be really out of character for him to think that way”. So trying to “ convince “ him seems more about you than him. Given his personality you’re never going to know fir sure if he’s just being self less or really wants to give up the other schools. Tell him you do not want him to go to any school but OSU. That feels a lot less manipulative to me.
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  • twoinanddonetwoinanddone 22422 replies14 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    My engineering child did not do study abroad. It didn't matter to her. She played a spring sport so if she would have done it it would have had to be summer or fall.

    My engineer nephew did not do study abroad either. His environmental engineer GF did a summer study in Sweden or Norway (something to do with volcanoes), and he went for about 3 weeks, 1 on his own and then met up with her. His family also goes Thanksgiving week to one European city (Paris, Rome, London and I don't remember the last one). He did a 5th year masters, and finished that this May. He and GF are finishing up 6 weeks in Europe next week, and then it is home to a job for her and a job search for him.

    So, long story short, Europe will still be there even if one doesn't do study abroad.
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  • UndercrackersUndercrackers 864 replies2 postsRegistered User Member
    I really like @calmom's strategy, and I also like dangling the $$ support of summer internships if OP's son goes to the state school. D has done two internships, but any costs associated with them are on her, even though we cover her tuition and room and board during the school year. She's had to weigh the costs of a summer internship opportunity (transportation, food, rent, etc.) against the income, which means some were just off the table altogether (either never pursued or offers declined). If OP can give son the freedom to choose internships based on interest/career building vs. economics, that will be a real gift. On the other hand, an engineering intern may have more decent paying internship opportunities than not, so...
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  • happymomof1happymomof1 29482 replies170 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    Freedom to choose internships is huge. If he drops engineering for fill-in-random-poorly-paid-major-here, cash on hand to pay for living expenses during an unpaid or grossly under-paid internship, or for a graduate degree later on, will be a really, really, really good thing.

    I just looked at the tOSU website, and it sure looks to me like he can find just about any major there he could be interested in. What, exactly, is this back-up major of his that he believes requires a "prestige" institution?
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  • bearcatfanbearcatfan 1142 replies12 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    It sounds like you are in Ohio.
    I'm not just saying this, but look at the University of Cincinnati especially for chemical engineering. Co-ops may not sound important right now, but the engineering students make BANK on their co-ops (I've heard $25-30K a semester) plus graduate with not only experience but job offers from their co-op partners. That's worth an extra semester or two, in my opinion.
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  • bopperbopper 13941 replies98 postsForum Champion CWRU Forum Champion
    With the first DD, I said "make a list of colleges that we can go visit" and she did. She picked a geographical distance from our house and researched schools within that. We visited most of those over Spring break junior year. I included a parent pick that met the criteria that she wanted. I encouraged her to start her application over the summer, but she waited until fall of Senior year whiledoing IB diploma with Math HL, Chem HL, and Physics HL. When she got the results back, there was a bimodal distribution of net costs...public State Us that were under 30K and a couple of privates over 40K. We didn't discuss budgets per se, but at that point as she was interested in the Public Us I told her to pick whatever one she wanted in the under 30K batch as I didn't think the others were worth it for her major, Math. We didn't get to go to admitted students day as we were living in Germany at the time. She ended up picking my parent pick college, which was the most expensive of the publics. She did great. She is a very independent person who likes to do online research.

    So for the second one, I started a little earlier. Fall break of Junior year I took her to our Big State U and an excellent State College that I thought would fit what she wanted and be affordable. She hated the big State U (you have to take busses to get around the campuses) but liked State College. I wanted her to get a feel for the type of college she might want to investigate more. Then I did the same thing. Go make your list. <crickets>... in the winter of Junior year I dragged her to the library, put a Fiske guide in front of her and say look at this....At some point she said "You like to look stuff up on the internet...can you come up with a list for me." So I used the various college search tools on naviance and here on CC and got some ideas for her. We visited them over Junior Fall break (including the State College again for reference). For her I know she wanted to be 1-2 hours away. Summer of junior year I insisted that she came up with a draft of her Common App essay and she did. So come fall, I asked her if she wanted to think about applying ED to State College...she kept comparing everything to it and it was affordable for us full pay....and she has a terrible time making decisions and I thought this would save her from having to choose in the spring. She did apply ED, got in, and is currently a Junior!

    So both of my kids ended up at an affordable parent pick that met their needs.

    I had a friend who said "I will pay in-state tuition for your college, but no more".
    One picked the State U, and one picked a neighboring StateU that was affordable for OOS.
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  • cypresspatcypresspat 240 replies7 postsRegistered User Junior Member
    @happymomof1 There is no back up major. He is 1000% convinced he will like chem engineering. There is no convincing him of otherwise. We, his parents, the non-17-year olds, know better and have urged him to consider the possibility and not pick a school which would be a bad fit for him if the engineering bombs out. tOSU likely has every major there is, agreed. But that doesn’t mean that it is solid in every major. It happens to be rock solid for chem engineering, according to his criteria. Thank goodness.
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  • cypresspatcypresspat 240 replies7 postsRegistered User Junior Member
    @austinmshauri Not sure where the idea came in that we can’t or won’t pay more than $25k. We are lucky and can afford full pay wherever he wants. But that doesn’t mean we WANT to. Especially when the state option is actually the better choice for his intended major.
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  • cypresspatcypresspat 240 replies7 postsRegistered User Junior Member
    @bearcatfan I completely agree. Could not get him to glance at U of Cincy. He has a set of criteria about the chem eng depts. will not budge off of it. I think co-ops are a great idea. He does not.
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  • cypresspatcypresspat 240 replies7 postsRegistered User Junior Member
    @roethlisburger There are no budget limitations. And he knows that.
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