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I don’t know what to do

JonJon28JonJon28 0 replies1 postsRegistered User New Member
I just graduated HS recently and I’ve applied some colleges. I live in Florida but I want to go to a college that I applied to in Alabama. I got accepted and everything but my mom consistently rubs it in my face about how she doesn’t want me to go up there for school. But at the same time money is not an issue because my aunt (her sister) saved up a lot of money since I was a baby to send me off to college. By the way my mom and my aunt don’t get along at all. So they can’t agree on anything. My aunt wants me to be successful in my education by any means necessary. But my mom is holding me back from not going to Alabama for school. I only have two more weeks to go off to college and I don’t know what to do. Should I leave home and go off to college before the semester starts? Or should I stay home with my mom and go to school she wanted me to go to and not be happy at the same time? I’m going though a lot right now. And my mom continues to use me being gay as an excuse to not send me off to college. What should I do, because I want her to know that it’s my life and I’m 19 turning 20, and I need to live my own life and make my own decisions whether she’s pleased or not! Help!
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Replies to: I don’t know what to do

  • boudersbouders 2432 replies170 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    JonJon28 wrote: »
    I want her to know that it’s my life and I’m 19 turning 20, and I need to live my own life and make my own decisions whether she’s pleased or not!
    Tell her this and then do it.
    You're 19. You don't have to do what your mother or anyone else wants.
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  • EmpireappleEmpireapple 1562 replies25 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    Go. Continue to tell your mom that you love her and be sure to stay in touch with her once your are at school. In the meantime try not to get into any arguments or discussions with her. Just be loving, helpful, and have fun together. She will be fine.
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  • AlmostThere2018AlmostThere2018 1249 replies44 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    A college education is your best investment for your future. And I echo everything. @empireapple said.

    Don't feel guilty. You're not leaving her; you'll be in touch and come home for visits.

    You won't regret it if you go but you probably will if you stay. She will come around when she realizes you still love her and will stay in touch, come for visits, etc. She'll just have to adjust.
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  • Groundwork2022Groundwork2022 1953 replies26 postsRegistered User Senior Member
    Another vote for attending college that you want to in Alabama... Be sure to reassure mom that you love her and she means the world to you.

    One of my favorite quotes is, "A ship in harbor is safe, but that's not what ships are built for." You might share that thought with your mother as it seems to apply in this situation.
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  • TenzimomTenzimom 3 replies1 postsRegistered User New Member
    You know the answer. Best of luck at school @JonJon28
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  • TS0104TS0104 833 replies26 postsRegistered User Member
    It seems unanimous that you should go, and we seem to be all parents giving that advice! Having your aunt finance your education is amazing, and I hope that she, or someone else, is a resource to you during the transition time. Are you all registered, have your dorm, roommate, meal plan, etc? Do you have a way to get to move in? You don't need your mom's permission to go, do you need anything from her financially? Just hoping that you have some adult helping you through this. Heading up early to college doesn't really seem to be an option (unless maybe your aunt lives near the school?), so just hang tight at home, try to make peace, you can make it for two more weeks. Good luck!
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