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Does your college affect marriage?

LebronislitLebronislit 20 replies9 threads Junior Member
I am a senior in high school and I told my mother today that I DO NOT want to apply to an Ivy League (or top 15) school. She was a little bit disappointed and told me that it may affect my marriage.

Then this question came to my mind. Will an Ivy League girl ever reject me because I am less educated, or if I went to a lower college? (I am aiming at a UC school, but also might consider community college and transfer if tuition turns out to be too high) This brings me to the next question, will an Ivy League girl ever reject me if I started my college career at a community college, but then transferred to a top school even if it is the Ivy League?

Thanks to anyone who read through this thread. Any comments/replies will be much appreciated.

Thanks again!
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Replies to: Does your college affect marriage?

  • CU123CU123 3628 replies70 threads Senior Member
    You might want to rethink this. The probability of you meeting an Ivy League girl at CC (of even a UC) is slightly above zero (depending on proximity to an Ivy League school). The probability of you meeting an Ivy League girl if you attend an Ivy League school is 100%. Chances of you meeting your spouse in college is around 30% or greater. IOW you probably don't need to worry about meeting an Ivy League girl.
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  • LebronislitLebronislit 20 replies9 threads Junior Member
    edited November 17
    @CU123 i also agree with "IOW you probably don't need to worry about meeting an Ivy League girl." but my mom wants me to be with someone educated lol
    edited November 17
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  • OhiBroOhiBro 353 replies6 threads Member
    Amazing schools are everywhere. So naturally, these schools will produce amazing and educated women.

    But they wont be Ivy Leaguers. 😏
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  • LebronislitLebronislit 20 replies9 threads Junior Member
    @OhiBro hahaha so true
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  • LebronislitLebronislit 20 replies9 threads Junior Member
    @MWolf Is that article saying success after college is more important than the college you attend when it comes to marriage?
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  • ucbalumnusucbalumnus 78992 replies701 threads Senior Member
    Some college graduates do meet their eventual spouses while in college, so attending a given college does increase the likelihood of meeting an eventual spouse from the same college (see https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/10/15/college-marriage-facebook/2989039/ ). That may be what your mother was thinking of.

    It seems that college prestige is much more important to your mother than it is to you.
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  • Data10Data10 3103 replies10 threads Senior Member
    edited November 18
    Then this question came to my mind. Will an Ivy League girl ever reject me because I am less educated, or if I went to a lower college? (I am aiming at a UC school, but also might consider community college and transfer if tuition turns out to be too high) This brings me to the next question, will an Ivy League girl ever reject me if I started my college career at a community college, but then transferred to a top school even if it is the Ivy League?
    A good portion of persons meet their spouse in college, so attending an Ivy League college (for either undergrad or grad) would likely increase odds of marrying someone from that Ivy League college. However, the majority of persons attending Ivies are focused on academics rather than meeting their future spouse, and instead meet their spouse after college, who more often than not attended a different college.

    If you are really obsessed with marrying someone from the Ivy League, then there are various dating apps/websites that allow you to search by name of college attended, so you could identify and message "Ivy League girls" directly. This brings up an important point about why you want to marry an "Ivy League girl"? Do you think Ivy League girls have specific traits that cannot be found in women who attended non-Ivy colleges?

    I'd expect that most "Ivy League girls" are not this obsessed about only marrying Ivy League guys and would not reject you solely because you attended a non-Ivy college. Or maybe that's the kind of girl you are looking for? Ones that share unique, specific beliefs about college attended?
    edited November 18
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  • LebronislitLebronislit 20 replies9 threads Junior Member
    @Data10 I don't really care where my significant other go. I'm just afraid that in the future, if I happened to be into someone that apparently went to a top school, I will get rejected solely because I didn't attend a top 15 school. But thank you, you have answered my question!
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  • thumper1thumper1 75471 replies3310 threads Senior Member
    My circle of friends, my kids’ circles of friends include some graduated from elite schools and some graduates of trade schools. All are “educated”.

    Does your mom mom hope that the first question you ask a new date is “what college did you graduate from?” If so...that is not likely the foundation for a strong relationship. You need more to look at why you are compatible, your shared interests, and the like.

    There are plenty of well education people who don’t attend Ivy League schools. I hope if you meet a significant other from a public university or school out of the top 20, that your parent will welcome them.
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  • coolguy40coolguy40 2410 replies3 threads Senior Member
    I'm sure Mom means well, but that's the most ridiculous thing I've heard all week. She's emotionally shaming you into going to a school SHE wants you to go to. If a woman you meet is going to measure you up by college brand name, then that woman clearly isn't mature enough to be married anyway, because she hasn't mastered the concept of unconditional love. Marriage doesn't work that way.
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  • JHSJHS 18503 replies72 threads Senior Member
    If we limited marriage to people who had "mastered the concept of unconditional love," there would be very, very few marriages happening.
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  • PublisherPublisher 8764 replies101 threads Senior Member
    edited November 18
    OP wrote:

    "I told my mother that I DO NOT want to apply to an Ivy League (or top 15) school."

    "She was a little bit disappointed and told me that it may affect my marriage."

    All your mother was suggesting, in my opinion, is that some find intellect, ambition and prospects of future success attractive qualities.

    Not an inappropriate comment as OP was the one who apparently initiated the conversation ( as portrayed in this thread ) & is considering attending community college.

    edited November 18
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