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Not Accepted to Any Desired Colleges? What Was Decision?

RathgarRathgar 108 replies19 threads Junior Member
For those who have had a student go through the college process already - has your child experienced NOT being accepted to any of the desired colleges? How did he/ she handle it? What was their final decision?

Mine has the safety/ reach thing covered, but is honestly not one bit interested in his safeties. Wondering what others experiences were?
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Replies to: Not Accepted to Any Desired Colleges? What Was Decision?

  • Mwfan1921Mwfan1921 2964 replies49 threads Senior Member
    Agree with everything above.
    Mine has the safety/ reach thing covered, but is honestly not one bit interested in his safeties.

    Keep looking.....it's important to have a highly likely/safety school that the student would be happy to attend. Don't apply anywhere the student does not want to go.

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  • GumbymomGumbymom 28834 replies210 threadsForum Champion UC Forum Champion
    All colleges that a student applies should be “desired” including as pointed at above, the Safety schools. As long as an applicant has a balanced college list with Safeties, Matches along with a few Reaches and they are willing to attend all, this should be a non-issue.
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  • WhrlingCollegesWhrlingColleges 41 replies1 threads Junior Member
    I have a safety story: daughter of a friend (very highly qualified applicant from a well-ranked NE public school) was one of "those kids" who was rejected from almost every single school. Applied to 17 schools, rejected at 16. Many on the list were places that could realistically be viewed as low reaches and matches. The one and only admission was to a SUNY. Student hated every minute of it and was clearly overqualified. Stuck it through for a year, earned a 4.0 average and transferred out to Emory. A story with a happy ending.
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  • ProfSDProfSD 92 replies2 threads Junior Member
    edited January 8
    homerdog wrote: »
    With S19, I don't think he loved any of his safeties even though I think we did the very best we could to find schools that were super similar to his reaches. He didn't really speak up too much during the process and luckily had a lot of options. After the process was over, he made some comment about how he would have gone to X school if he "had" to but he would have been planning to transfer asap. I feel like we dodged a bullet and I don't know why he wasn't up front with me during the process and told me that he didn't like his safer schools enough to give them a chance. I think part of it was that he felt very sure via Naviance and our counselors that he would at least get into his high matches which he definitely did like so he didn't feel compelled to search high and low for a really good safety.

    This is the reality. As much as we try to emphasize having a safety the student loves, they are 17 and just can't always see the big picture, especially when peers (and sometimes other adults) are comparing lists, rankings, and prestige.

    D20 loved one of her low match/high safety colleges. Had she not been accepted to her ED choice, it would have been one of the top contenders. She considered it more desirable than several of her high match and reach schools, even though it was much lower in prestige and ranking. The only drawback was the distance (we live in MA and it's in PA). I don't think I can take credit for that though. We emphasized the need for a balanced list that only had schools she would like to attend, but she had a spectacular visit and really connected with the Provost, admissions staff, and students there. Sometimes despite our best efforts, our kids have their own agendas. They can nod and "yes" our statements, but that doesn't mean they are truly in agreement.
    edited January 8
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  • momofsenior1momofsenior1 8291 replies70 threads Senior Member
    @EconPop - I totally agree with this: "Waiting 6 weeks, 8 weeks, 10 weeks, 14 weeks for the other schools' decision days might be costing them".

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  • HiToWaMomHiToWaMom 1421 replies17 threads Senior Member
    Long time ago, D was rejected from her ED school. I wasn't there when she got the news but I think there was some crying. The dinner that night was very quiet. It was heartbreaking to see her trying to keep the calm composure.

    I don't remember how long it took her to recover from the rejection but eventually she did and worked on her the rest of the applications.

    She got in her ED II school.
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  • elena13elena13 956 replies15 threads Member
    How many parents of teenagers have successfully been able to make their kids like or not like something? It's one thing if you don't have to worry about a budget for college - that makes finding safeties much easier. However, I had to accept that both of my kids were not going to love their safety schools and that was ok with me.

    We were very fortunate that UGA was the best safety option that was affordable. They would have chosen it (or my S would have gone to GT) over other affordable safety schools. Had they ended up there, I'm certain they would have had great experiences and likely would have been happy in the end. However, during the application process they weren't going to love it and I wasn't going to be able to make them. However, we had lots of conversations about the likelihood of acceptance and affordability at other schools on their list. We all knew the low chances and were on board with the safety schools despite not loving them.
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  • helpingmom40helpingmom40 199 replies6 threads Junior Member
    We looked long and hard for safety schools and DD settled on 3 that rounded out her list. Each of them brought something unique to the table to be excited about - phenomenal study abroad opportunities, a vibrant arts community that was open to all majors, a variation of a major she hadn’t seen before. She was looking for a certain feeling that she didn’t find at any state schools, we needed financial aid or merit aid at all of the privates, and it wasn’t easy to traipse around 30 different campuses but we did it. She could honestly say she would have been happy to attend any of the 10 schools she applied to. I am glad she was accepted to her ED school because I seriously think she would have had a very hard time making a decision!
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