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Regarding PG year at boarding school

hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
Hey CC, ive recently been considering some things and was wondering about an issue im sure is highly unorthodox, wanted some input if possible. To keep things brief, i attended a boarding school but didnt finish due to financial issues at the time. Transferred into my local public hs and finished, then went on to uni but withdrew for a mix of similar issues and family matters (was a us news top 25 uni if thats at all relevant).

Would it be at all possible to take a PG year at a boarding school at this stage? I would be mid 20s when applying which im sure is unheard of and bizarre, but idk if there are any concrete age cut offs. Stat wise ssat way back in the day was 94th percentile iirc and gpa was fine (over a 3.8 uw) although i didnt take rigorous courses during my time at the local hs as it was a rather tumultuous time for me (if this option turns out to be possible i would of course self prep a bunch of ap tests to get 5's and take the SAT aiming for 1500 or 1550+).

Is such an option possible or is it entirely absurd?

Thanks


p.s. not sure if pertinent but i withdrew from uni quite early on and have 0 college credits, so if that would be criteria that could block me from doing this, its a non-issue.. but i imagine the main problem would be age lol
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Replies to: Regarding PG year at boarding school

  • twoinanddonetwoinanddone 22703 replies15 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    It's not possible. You are too old.

    And what would be the purpose? Most kids doing a PG year are doing it for sports, to up scores on tests, to mature a little. You already have the tests and stats to get into college, you are too old for sports, and if you haven't matured enough for college at 22-23 years old, a PG year isn't going to help.

    Really, if you were a parent of student at the boarding school, would you be happy to learn a 23 year old was in the same dorm?
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    to address the last part, certainly it would be a bit odd but i dont see the significant diff between that and if i had taken the pg year when i actually graduated hs (would have been 20 during pg year).

    a bit depressing if its not possible. oh well i guess.
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    also @twoinanddone , its not so much a question of maturity or stats as you yourself noted. Truthfully, part of it could be psychological (trying to somehow "make up" for having to leave boarding school in the past , also having had the chance to attend a hades school but family preventing me .. diff story for a diff time ). Another part would be the possibility that it helps in a scenario where i apply fresh to some colleges rather than going back to the one i withdrew from (while by no means a bad school at top 25 us news, my peers who had stats on par w my own at boarding school and stayed all ended up at ivies). Could be an opportunity to show i can handle rigor and perform well in hard classes since ill need to offset the stain on my apps that is my lack of rigor at public school, and the only other way would be self study for ap tests but idk if its enough.

    are you sure theres no possibility at all?? is it an official age cut off or are you simply speculating that admissions wouldnt even consider it? If its truly nothing more than an age issue, could there be some way to work around it i.e. live off campus or something?
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  • twoinanddonetwoinanddone 22703 replies15 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    The official age cut off for public schools is 21 and most all schools I know of follow that - if not sooner.

    You can't go back and have a redo just because you want to finish up something - play for the championship, star in the school play, become homecoming queen/king. You may not have been accepted for a PG year if you were 20.

    If you think you can find a school to take you, go ahead and look. I think you'll find if you take the ACT or an AP test now, the scores would not be counted for college credit or placement.
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    i guess ill try and look, maybe just ask directly. Was hoping to get more hopeful feedback.. oh well. I suppose i should be a cautionary tale to parents who for whatever reason consider turning down a hades school off the waitlist offer on their childs behalf without even telling the child and having them find out later.

    thanks for taking the time to try and help, i appreciate it.
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  • OHMomof2OHMomof2 12750 replies236 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    If you are ready to continue your education, college is the place to do it, now. Or trade school or whatever. You could try a course or two at a community college, BUT if you currently have 0 college credits and can apply as a first year student and think you want to do a 4 year college, then don't do that (jeopardize your first year status) but rather begin looking at colleges now to apply to in the fall.
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    open question to students both current and prospective, as well as parents ofc.

    A child getting into andover/exeter off the waitlist but they contact one parent w/ the offer and he/she says no on the childs behalf w/out consulting the child or even making him/her privy to their acceptance.. said child discovers this the following year during an interview at the school (reapplying).

    Has anyone encountered this happening or was my exp. bizarre?
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    judging from the number of views and lack of responses, im guessing its rather bizarre and unheard of, lol. Nice to know i just have an especially messed up family, or rather one parent.
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  • doschicosdoschicos 20883 replies217 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    I think it is unusual for you to be dwelling on it a decade or so after the fact. Time to move on. A prep school isn't going to take someone in their 20s.
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    i dont think its unusual at all given i got into my dream school and one considered the best in the country and the opportunity to attend was stolen from me, by an action that was actually in violation of custody agreement at the time.. plus the fact that the perp. faced zero consequences is unsettling. Even if one could argue that my net outcome wouldnt have differed since it seems to be par for the course (3.8 at another boarding school that is considered tier 2 and attendance at a top 25 us news uni), it sure would have been nice to attend phillips, plus idk what would have happened had i gone.. its all speculation.

    Its something that tends to stay with you and is difficult to just move on from or get over. Even the judge at the time told the parent in question that their action could have lifelong consequences for me before changing child support payment structure in response to the parent's duplicitous action.
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  • CheddarcheeseMNCheddarcheeseMN 3345 replies11 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    Ok, it’s rare. Now what?
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    just wanted confirmation.
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  • doschicosdoschicos 20883 replies217 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    You can't always get what you want
    But if you try sometimes, well, you might find
    You get what you need.

    - M. Jagger & K. Richards


    Yes, it is unusual for you to be harboring resentment for so long. It's not healthy to be dwelling on it so long after the fact. If you haven't already, perhaps seek some counseling so you can move on. I don't mean this in a flip way but in a sincere attempt for you to get to a better place. In the grand scheme of things, much, much worse could happen in life.
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    i suspect the quotation would be more accurately aligned with someone who didnt get in and whines over it.. not someone who did and who in any normal course of events and any other universe would have attended, but didnt due to an illegal, duplicitous action of a third party. I respectfully disagree with your overall assessment, but i can agree that eventually ill be forced to move on it seems and live with it.
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  • RedLionessRedLioness 89 replies1 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    it's uh... That's interesting. And also really sucks.

    For sure, that didn't happen to me. While one of my parents led me to believe we hadn't gotten a decision from a LDS that had actually waitlisted me, I was made aware of all my decisions before I chose my school.

    I also think the people who are telling you not to dwell on it are spot on. While that really sucks, and maybe you should still talk to the parent about it, it's been years. And yes, something like that sticks with you (believe me, I know), but you have to at least try and make your peace with it now. Harboring resentment and regret over this doesn't make you any happier, and you can't change what happened to you then. It's best to try to find some closure. You didn't get to attend whatever Phillips you got accepted to, and your life moved on. Perhaps you should talk to your parent and find some closure that way. Yell at them about it, if you want.

    But don't keep hanging onto this. It seems like you made it perfectly fine regardless, so don't poison your life that way.
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    thanks for the sympathetic words.

    the parent and i dont have a good relationship anymore , prob something akin to be estranged. When we do rarely see each other, its unpleasant to put it mildly, lol. I dont intend to put any effort into changing that since i dont want a relationship w the parent anymore after what they did.

    While the net outcome wasnt bad by any means, i never was in a position (due to this and then other events that transpired afterwards related to schools as well as family issues) to go full throttle and put 100 percent of effort in, so any outcome i have is a result of likely 50 percent effort (studying+hw max maybe 1-2 hours , zero preparation for standardized testing etc).

    While i could just go back to uni and give it my all there, it just wont ever be the same, but i guess its time to just look at uni and beyond and move on from secondary school altogether. Ill prob end up as one of those parents trying to vicariously live through their kids, berating them ruthlessly and threatening to disown them if they deviate, even to the slightest degree, from hades + ivy/stern/ross + bb ib + pe.

    (last part was a joke and attempt to lighten my own mood with humor in case it wasnt obvious and to avoid anyone commenting harshly under the presumption it was serious, lol).
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  • twoinanddonetwoinanddone 22703 replies15 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    You've chosen your hill to die on. You've ended your relationship with your parent over this. You didn't reapply as a sophomore or junior, you didn't apply for a PG year.

    Now you can let this control the rest of your life or you can go to college and have a career. You could even become a teacher and get a position at Phillips if that's what it will really take for you to get over it.
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  • hadesinquisitorhadesinquisitor 30 replies3 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    first paragraph tells me you didnt read the op but your overall sentiment isnt wrong. Probably will go back to uni, at least it was still a target, and just have to face the hurdle of my age in ib, or go to med school as backup and aim for derma.
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  • RedLionessRedLioness 89 replies1 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    @hadesinquisitor happy that you (mostly) got out of what I feel like you consider a toxic relationship, then! :)

    That also sucks that you weren't really able to put effort into your schoolwork. Do what you want to with your life (as long as that isn't suicide)! It's your life, you get to live it. As long as you enjoy it, I'll be happy for you.

    And the sense of humor is appreciated :wink:

    @twoinanddone you can't exactly reapply if you've been accepted, and your parent has willingly shown that they don't want you to go.

    also, please don't assume things. you don't know the dude's situation and family life is a pretty delicate topic to begin with. I don't mean to upset you, but fwiw I think you should try to be more cautious when posting things online (especially regarding to family).
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  • austinmshauriaustinmshauri 8842 replies325 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    You got into a top 25 university, so your test scores and public high school couldn't have been horrible. School is what you make it, so if you only put in 50% effort you're not going to get the same results as if you put in 100% effort. It stinks that your parent did that but plenty of parents refuse to pay for expensive schools, so you're not alone. I don't understand why you only blame your parent, though, and not the school which neglected to inform both your parents about the decision. If they hadn't dropped the ball you'd have known in time to do something. And when they found out (in time to fix it) they apparently didn't. So it sounds like there's blame to spread around.

    You can keep the chip on your shoulder and blame the experience for every "failure" or recognize the opportunity to attend the other boarding school and the top 25 US university for the privilege that it is. It's too bad the university didn't work out, but you can't go back to boarding school in your mid-20's. It's not the direct path to the Ivies you seem to think it is anyway.

    Your best path forward is to figure out how to get a college degree. In your other thread you said you have 0 college credits. Did you withdraw before the end of the first semester or do you actually have W's on your transcript? If you tell us your state and budget maybe we can help you find an affordable school.
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