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Choosing a sport to "drop"

one1ofeachone1ofeach 79 replies5 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
Does anyone have words of wisdom about dropping a club sport once attending a bs with a sports requirement? My son's issue is that he plays both club soccer and basketball, basically at the same level and both have their major seasons in the spring for highschool students. It seems that he will likely only be able to do one of these and keep up with school and the 3 sport requirement. I think he is better at one but he is more tied into the other club. Has anyone faced a similar situation? It is heartbreaking to me that club coaches are so ridiculous that they also want kids to choose when all the research says the more well rounded the athlete the better.

My first plan of attack is to see how both highschool seasons go and then have a long discussion with both club coaches to see where they see him on the spectrum of players. I think if one coach says "clearly a D1 player" and the other says "D3 is the best he can hope for" the decision may be slightly easier. Right? I mean it makes sense to stick with the sport that you have the most potential in if you love them equally??????

Man, my worry gene is out of control today. This kid is going to age me fast!
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Replies to: Choosing a sport to "drop"

  • twoinanddonetwoinanddone 22976 replies17 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    Do you really think D1 basketball is a possibility?
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  • doschicosdoschicos 21123 replies219 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    Is he boarding? Even one club sport will be very challenging.
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  • cinnamon1212cinnamon1212 434 replies6 threadsRegistered User Member
    Why not ask your son which sport he loves the most?

    My son had to decide between hockey and soccer when he was 13, and chose soccer. I think it's almost impossible to play 2 club sports (ie at a high level) let alone layering in the prep school sports. Schoolwork would suffer, at a minimum.

    If he loves both equally then maybe ask the coaches where he projects out to be. Though, in 9th grade, unless he is one of the best in the state, it will be hard to say with soccer.
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  • sushirittosushiritto 4001 replies12 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    edited September 16
    It is heartbreaking to me that club coaches are so ridiculous that they also want kids to choose when all the research says the more well rounded the athlete the better.

    Speaking as a former club soccer and AAU bball coach, please pick one. Your son's teammates will want your S at practice and games. You will have conflicts and big ones. AAU tournaments are literally all day/night long on weekends. And each sport requires different skills that need to be improved

    I eventually had to choose too. :smiley:
    edited September 16
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  • ChoatieMomChoatieMom 5248 replies240 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    edited September 16
    And, for many, the choice is between BS and club sports, any club sport, as some boarding schools simply won’t allow the student to be absent from campus to the extent a club commitment requires. Any requirement for club sport participation should be discussed with the school prior to admission. A day student would have an easier time, obviously.

    There are several parents here (@SevenDad) whose children were able to continue with a single club sport but not without a lot of planning and cooperation from the school.
    edited September 16
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  • Golfgr8Golfgr8 1031 replies18 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    This is why I love golf....but seriously, if you play certain sports the club/travel team pressure is huge. Many college recruiting activities happen at club-travel type showcases. Also, in some sports like soccer, hockey and lax, the coaches may ask for your club/travel team experience before they look at your school team experience. For some sports, the club-travel participation affords more playing and practice time. I am not saying this is better. Only agreeing it’s a tough issue. It’s though to balance club sports - especially at schools that have classes on Saturdays and/or many closed weekends. Some travel/club showcases and tournaments are all weekend - that is key studying time! Plus, some kids really thrive with the social scene on the weekends and that is a big part of the BS experience to miss for a club sport. Be prepared for sacrifices and choices.
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  • CTMom21CTMom21 436 replies2 threadsRegistered User Member
    Is it equally feasible to play with either club from his school? Like others have said, club sports are tough for BS kids, both physically and logistically. My DS plays two club sports (different seasons), and it only works (sort of) because we live relatively close to his school and I can drive him to his fall sport practices, and his winter/spring club provides at least some transportation. Realistically a kid can only play a club sport on Sundays if he’s simultaneously doing a school sport, which takes away his one day off from his school sport and (if the school has Saturday classes) his one day off.

    If he is going to stick with the club sport, he really needs to love it, because it comes with a lot of sacrifices.
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  • murray93murray93 127 replies16 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    This showed up in latest posts, so although I don’t have a prep school kid, I can share my son’s story. He is an incredible athlete and could go as far as he wants in whatever sport he picks. A few years ago, he needed to make a choice between baseball (pitcher/SS) and soccer (goalie). He picked baseball because his high school had a stronger program in baseball. Well, this year he tells me he made a mistake and he wants to go back to soccer. He worked out all summer to get ready and he hit the field and has created an enormous stir, it’s like he never missed a beat and the coaches are all like who is this kid?? (He also grew about 6” since he quit LOL) Lesson being, if he makes a mistake, and he’s really that good, he can always go back to it! Just make a solid first choice and it’ll all work out.
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  • PrepDad2018PrepDad2018 63 replies1 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    Is he boarding? If so I would drop all out of all club sports. If he is that good, his impact on your prep school teams would still develop college interest. If he is a day student, drop at least one and see how it goes. My son put in 5 hours of HW last night after classes and school sports....no way could he have left for four hours to go to an off campus soccer practice.
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  • cinnamon1212cinnamon1212 434 replies6 threadsRegistered User Member
    If OP's boarding school is in the CT/MA/NY area, Black Rock is a high level soccer club that takes the best prep school players and as a result fits with the boarding school schedule. So that makes it a bit easier to manage both.

    It is by invitation, and since they tweaked their format, it is unclear how many new spots they will have.
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  • Happytimes2001Happytimes2001 1379 replies10 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    We faced this also. My kid was doing both club, and school sport and a high level team of another sort ( not athletic). There were no days off. Even Sunday was a practice day.
    Although the talent was there, choices had to be made. My kid decided that to opt for BS sports and the other team. Since the club sport was dropped, kid is now able to do three varsity level sports at BS with less effort. And my kid was able to keep the other team commitment. Honestly was a hard decision. Priorities in our family are: school 1st, other things second.

    My kid also spoke to a family friend who is a DI athlete in the same sport. Getting up at 5AM and practicing for 4-5 hours a day doesn't sound like the path my kid wanted to take even if it's possible. Also my kid didn't like the idea of traveling to away games while in college. My kid would likely have been a DII type. It's good to speak to others about their actual experience playing that college sport. For my kid, playing a college level sport meant academics would take a back seat and that wasn't the direction s/he wanted to go in. Glad it's been semi-resolved.

    I think kiddo will be a little bit sad when kids from the club start getting signed but it's all good. Having more time has already been a bonus.

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  • one1ofeachone1ofeach 79 replies5 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    Do you really think D1 basketball is a possibility?

    I was using D1 as an easy example to illustrate if his coaches say he's waaaaay better in one sport than the other it might make a decision easier. Honestly, is he going to get recruited by KY? Nope. Mid D1? I have no idea. That's why I would be guided by info from someone who has sent a range of kids to a range of schools over the past 30 years.

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  • one1ofeachone1ofeach 79 replies5 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    Thank you for all the comments - so many helpful things to think about.
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  • dogsmama1997dogsmama1997 460 replies29 threadsRegistered User Member
    Golfgr8 wrote: »
    This is why I love golf....but seriously, if you play certain sports the club/travel team pressure is huge.

    I absolutely thought of you when I read this thread and said to myself "gee I really wish my kid's sport was golf!" I'm sure there's still wear and tear but it seems more forgiving than what mine if trying to do right now.
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  • GoatMamaGoatMama 1199 replies10 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    My older kid, currently a BS senior, played a club sport all four years in a fully residential BS with Saturday classes, 3 sports requirement, and no family in the area to help out with logistics. It is possible, but not easy. Lots of determination on part of the student and cooperation on part of the school. Two club sports in the same season would be impossible even back home.
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  • twoinanddonetwoinanddone 22976 replies17 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    Getting up at 5AM and practicing for 4-5 hours a day doesn't sound like the path my kid wanted to take even if it's possible. Also my kid didn't like the idea of traveling to away games while in college. My kid would likely have been a DII type.

    D2 kids get up at 5 am too, and travel to games. I think your child might like intramural sports as even club sports travel to other schools.

    It is not like D1 kids put in the most effort, then D2, then D3. Really, they all put in a lot of time. The division the school plays in may have more to do with the size of the school (although there are very small D1 schools) and the budget for the athletic dept.
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  • ChoatieMomChoatieMom 5248 replies240 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    D2 kids get up at 5 am too, and travel to games

    Non-club kids get up at that hour as well. Rowers are up at 0'dark-thirty every day. Choate does not have a boathouse, so the crew team had to travel at ungodly hours to the one they share. There were afternoon erg practices as well. Crew is one of the most relentless time sports. I still shake my head about it.
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  • GKUnionGKUnion 166 replies6 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    Is he boarding? If so I would drop all out of all club sports. If he is that good, his impact on your prep school teams would still develop college interest. If he is a day student, drop at least one and see how it goes. My son put in 5 hours of HW last night after classes and school sports....no way could he have left for four hours to go to an off campus soccer practice.

    My son doesn’t go to a prep school but he’s heavily involved with a club sport. I received an email from one of his AP teachers this morning. It was very complimentary but the teacher was concerned that he recorded and submitted his persuasive argument live video at 12:42 a.m. today. Such is the life of an athlete with a strong academic course load.
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  • Happytimes2001Happytimes2001 1379 replies10 threadsRegistered User Senior Member
    @choatie Mom Yep, never thought about rowing.

    Hadn't thought DIV II and III as not practicing or traveling. It was just that our frame of reference was talking to a DIV I athlete in the same sport as my kid. Our family hasn't done sports for generations so we don't really know what's involved. We sort of figure it out as we go along.

    Often it's the coach or the club that gives out information. For the record, I honestly don't trust many/any of the club teams. They are going to send their best and the rest aren't going to get much. Some of these families are spending a lot on the chance their kid gets an athletic "scholarship" The families aren't considering how few spots there are and their kid might like another school than the one offering the $$. If that's the path the kid wants to take great as long as everyone knows the chances.

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  • 417WHB417WHB 44 replies4 threadsRegistered User Junior Member
    I can't imagine playing on two club teams plus doing school sports would be possible in any academically challenging high school, the only places where I can see it are the sports academies where athletics are as important as academics and all kids go there with hope of going pro or being recruited. My kid did it in middle school and it became insane by 7th grade, and main reason interest in boarding school emerged. So, we made a decision one of the sports will be played at school only. Our BS has a fair number of kids who do one club sport, but it is usually with local club team, and the families are close enough to do the weekend driving to games or tournaments. We talked to all the coaches before accepting a spot to see the feasibility, and only looked at schools within reasonable driving distance for that reason. Still it is very challenging because they do want freshmen to play three sports and practices and games take a ton of time. And even when the off-season sport practices are on campus, doing double practices and then still have a ton of homework is hard. Mine has some free periods during the day that can be used as catch up but again it would be nice to be able to use them to socialize and make friends instead, or meet with teachers during their office hours.
    BTW our kid also really loves both club sports, we picked the one to continue club with mostly because it is lower commitment, it is more aligned with high school sports season, and is just workable logistically, for the time being anyway.
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