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Stanford vs. Princeton

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Replies to: Stanford vs. Princeton

  • MojaveMochaMojaveMocha Registered User Posts: 123 Junior Member
    I've got no opinion on either of the two schools. But if you visited both and feel as though you are meant for Stanford, then go for it. Don't ever feel guilty about doing what will make you happy. Admissions officers are used to students changing their minds, they won't take it personally.
  • BaelorBaelor Registered User Posts: 3,640 Senior Member
    ^That's not the problem.

    The problem is that the OP outright lied, and chose to. That diminishes the credibility of his counselor and his school -- if you think I'm kidding, then you definitely need to talk to my high school, where this has been an issue in the past.

    Again, to the OP: If you say something, do it. Otherwise, why believe anything you say at all?
  • MojaveMochaMojaveMocha Registered User Posts: 123 Junior Member
    The OP didn't lie. At the time he/she genuinely thought they would be attending Princeton. And now after more thought that doesn't appear to be the best course of action. Again, Princeton won't be hurting to find someone to fill the now open spot, and while its a possibility that the credibility of their hs and counselors could be hurt (though I don't know why they would since its ultimately the student's decision) - oh well. Why should the OP take a spot at a school they don't 100% want to be at; that's only taking a seat at Princeton from a kid on the wait list who's dying to go.

    It's life. If what you're doing truly makes you happy and isn't hurting anybody else (which turning down Pton for Stanford isn't) then do it. You don't really owe them anything but an explanation that you simply changed your mind. It wasn't a binding decision. You haven't paid the money. Better to break off the engagement than get married and eventually divorce.
  • MarsdenMarsden Registered User Posts: 654 Member
    I find the place a total cesspool.

    Not to defend California unduly--it's overcrowded and, at the moment, a financial disaster--but it's also incredibly diverse and to thus characterize it gave me a good laugh!

    Meanwhile, attacking the OP for "lying" is preposterous. People are allowed to waver, and even change their minds. It's part of being human and--guess what--people at Princeton are actually capable of dealing with that.
    The two most useless types of threads...

    OMG, how on earth does one decide? ;)
  • JohnAdams12JohnAdams12 - Posts: 2,587 Senior Member
    tomjones, the ChE rankings are from the USNWR that just came out for graduate engineering programs:

    Chemical - Best Engineering Schools - Graduate Schools - Education - US News and World Report

    Through at least the last four decades Princeton ChE has ranked in the top ten just about every year, with many years at the top 3 - and several at #1 in the country.

    ChE has been one of Princeton's long running strongest programs during this period, along with Physics, Math and Philosophy. Although I now see that Princeton's Economics, History and Political Science departments are currently ranked #1 in the country.

    Quality-wise there is not much difference in the ChE major between the two schools.

    The OP now has to decide which one of these incredible universities he feels more comfortable with - and it appears that it is going to be The Farm.

    I happen to believe that there is nothing like Princeton in the world for undergraduate school.


    From an alum that graduated from both Ol Nassau and The Farm

    Princeton ChE
    Stanford MBA
  • BaelorBaelor Registered User Posts: 3,640 Senior Member
    The OP didn't lie. At the time he/she genuinely thought they would be attending Princeton.

    That's not true. The OP did something and said another, and the two are mutually exclusive. He was completely aware of this. Therefore, it constitutes a lie (it's just spread out over a time period).

    Someone says they will not shoot you. Then they turn around and shoot you in the face. They say they genuinely didn't intend to. Do you care? No. All you care about is the gigantic disconnect between statement and action -- something that the adcoms at the school WILL care about.

    Original statement:
    I emailed the admissions lady saying thank you and that I would attend


    It wasn't a binding decision.

    Correct. But he still said he would attend to someone -- and now is not. Do you not see how that is a breach of trust on a personal level?

    Not to defend California unduly--it's overcrowded and, at the moment, a financial disaster--but it's also incredibly diverse and to thus characterize it gave me a good laugh!

    Out of curiosity, I was wondering about this -- I'm looking for an area of California with incredibly intelligent, wealthy, socially archconservative, religious people, and a government that reflects all of these traits very closely. I want the weather to change from warm to cold (i.e., seasons). Where should I live?

    Meanwhile, attacking the OP for "lying" is preposterous. People are allowed to waver, and even change their minds. It's part of being human and--guess what--people at Princeton are actually capable of dealing with that.

    That's not the issue here -- the OP said one thing and did another. If he had said, "I likely will attend," I would have no issue whatsoever. It's the fact that he told someone at Princeton he was coming and then did not. That clearly reflects badly on him and his school.

    I'm not saying he should go to Princeton if he doesn't want to. But don't say something definitive if it's not so definitive after all.
  • MojaveMochaMojaveMocha Registered User Posts: 123 Junior Member
    A lie is an intentionally false statement. While your "shoot you in the face" example is, emotionally evoking? - it still stands that the OP did not lie. If I say I'm going to shoot you in the face, have the gun inches from you but then the cops bust in, cuff me and drag me away before I can pull the trigger - have I lied? Or did the circumstances just change?

    Did he make a mistake in saying that he was going? Sure. But the fact remains that when he e-mailed the admissions officer; he thought that he was going to Princeton...and then something changed. Its really not a a big a deal as we're making it out to be. A "breach of trust on a personal level" makes it sound as though they've been dating exclusively for a year. Which wasn't the case, in fact the adcom knew he was looking at other school since he wasn't early action (lol).

    Again, There are hundreds of kids vying for that one spot. The fact that an accepted student changed his mind - only makes everyone happy here.
  • BaelorBaelor Registered User Posts: 3,640 Senior Member
    have the gun inches from you but then the cops bust in, cuff me and drag me away before I can pull the trigger - have I lied? Or did the circumstances just change?

    That's different -- there's an external agent. Here the OP has complete agency. He could have decided not to make the statement in the first place, and he could have still picked Princeton.

    The situation that you are describing is not analogous at all.

    It's very simple -- it's a lie by definition if you can follow through but do not. "I intend to go to Princeton" would not have been a lie in this case (but would have had the OP actually preferred Stanford).

    Which wasn't the case, in fact the adcom knew he was looking at other school since he wasn't early action (lol).

    Princeton has no early program, so I don't see how this is relevant.

    The point is that when dealing with people, it is better not to say anything than to lie (under the definition that I gave). It is a big deal.
  • eating foodeating food Registered User Posts: 1,927 Senior Member
    The problem is that the OP outright lied, and chose to. That diminishes the credibility of his counselor and his school -- if you think I'm kidding, then you definitely need to talk to my high school, where this has been an issue in the past.

    Baelor: Honestly, who cares? He will never have to deal with Princeton or his high school administration again.
  • BaelorBaelor Registered User Posts: 3,640 Senior Member
    Baelor: Honestly, who cares? He will never have to deal with Princeton or his high school administration again.

    Exactly. This is the big problem -- as long as I can get away with it, it's fine! Who cares if I trample everyone on my amoral rampage towards self-gratification? etc.

    It really is a matter of respect. But this has gone on too long --

    Do we agree that the OP, in the future, should not make conclusive and definitive statements unless he, acting as his own agent, follows through with them? If yes, we can move on.
  • gedion9324gedion9324 Registered User Posts: 209 Junior Member
    "Exactly. This is the big problem -- as long as I can get away with it, it's fine! Who cares if I trample everyone on my amoral rampage towards self-gratification? etc."

    Easy Reverand Baelor, this is not the place...
  • randombetchrandombetch Registered User Posts: 1,079 Senior Member
    No one in the Princeton administration will give a flying f*** whether the OP chooses to attend or not. He's not that important. He would not be trampling anyone by going to Stanford.

    The OP's LIFE, however, can be drastically different depending on which institution he decides to attend (the people you meet, the places you'll end up living, extra curriculars you choose to do, etc. might all be different). It would be ridiculously stupid to go to Princeton if the OP thinks Stanford's a better fit just because he told someone at Princeton that he'd come to Princeton.
  • BaelorBaelor Registered User Posts: 3,640 Senior Member
    ^I agree wholeheartedly.
  • eating foodeating food Registered User Posts: 1,927 Senior Member
    Baelor... I love you, but you're literally crazy.
  • BaelorBaelor Registered User Posts: 3,640 Senior Member
    ILYtoo eating food
This discussion has been closed.