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My parents want to study abroad with me...

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Replies to: My parents want to study abroad with me...

  • PurpleTitanPurpleTitan Registered User Posts: 9,999 Senior Member
    Yeah, the idea that Japan is too dangerous is a hoot. Japan is one of the safest countries in the world. In fact, many Japanese who visit the US are shocked by the comparatively wild disorder and high crime that they see and hear about here. Compared to Japan, the US is a Mad Max environment.
  • MYOS1634MYOS1634 Registered User Posts: 31,520 Senior Member
    Study abroad. If they want to come along, they won't be able to live in the dorms and go to class with you.
  • tucsonmomtucsonmom Registered User Posts: 347 Member
    I just wanted to say that I hope you go through with the study abroad program in Japan. A friend of mine did that in college and she had a wonderful time. That was quite a long time ago now and she is still good friends with people she met there. She loved Japan.

    It's a very safe country.
  • Chocolate-TacoChocolate-Taco Registered User Posts: 48 Junior Member
    @endless67 Have you found a resolution with your parents? I eventually sat down with my parents and very clearly laid out why I'm studying abroad, what it will do for me, and I committed to a minimum number of times I'd contact them each week. Laying out what studying abroad will do for you will quickly conflict with them accompanying you, and that may help to clearly show that the supportive parental choice is actually to NOT go with you.
  • NEPatsGirlNEPatsGirl Registered User Posts: 2,193 Senior Member
    Timely post for me. I want to go with my D a week before check-in to help her get settled. She thinks I should come at the end and do some travelling in Europe with her. Glad to hear that neither of these uncommon.

    OP, I think your parents are probably just a bit nervous. Have you travelled at all by yourself (or with groups?) I would be a little nervous too if you aren't accustomed to being on your own. Study abroad can be very stessful for a student as well. Four months so far away from home is much different than a drive away... That being said, I hope they come around. I like the idea of them coming to help you get settled in. I'm far from being a Helicopter Mom but having my D arrive in a foreign country by herself and trying to do everything by herself makes me a bit nervous as well.
  • gouf78gouf78 Registered User Posts: 5,698 Senior Member
    NEPats--we visited at end of son's study abroad. That way he became our tour guide and he was done with classes with time to travel freely. So much fun!
  • melvin123melvin123 Registered User Posts: 559 Member
    @NEPatsGirl I'm like you and would prefer to get my D settled in and have me feel comfortable about her situation. And, I'd think my D would prefer me to come before the program starts rather than after. After the program, she'd hopefully have friends, and might want to travel with them for a couple of weeks before coming home.
  • doschicosdoschicos Registered User Posts: 14,473 Senior Member
    "I like the idea of them coming to help you get settled in. I'm far from being a Helicopter Mom but having my D arrive in a foreign country by herself and trying to do everything by herself makes me a bit nervous as well."

    That's where a lot of the growth comes from. Remember, she'll have access to advice and assistance from study abroad staff. Plus, it's a time to bond with staff, host families if applicable, and other students. I highly suggest you reconsider and visit in the middle or end of the semester not at the beginning. You might be nervous but your child will be fine. And even if he/she isn't due to homesickness, nervousness, being outside their comfort zone, that's part of the experience and they'll survive and come out stronger and more confident for having gone through the experience.
  • MaineLonghornMaineLonghorn Super Moderator Posts: 31,366 Super Moderator
    My daughter studied in Spain as a high school sophomore. She went through CIEE - excellent organization, although not a cheap way to go. They STRONGLY suggested that parents wait until the end of the trip to visit, so that's what we did - DH went over and they drove up the coast together. The only disadvantage to that was that D was sad after leaving her new friends.
  • VickiSoCalVickiSoCal Registered User Posts: 1,964 Senior Member
    You are a 20 year old college student with an earlier curfew than my 18 year old high school senior had. There's more going on here.
  • NEPatsGirlNEPatsGirl Registered User Posts: 2,193 Senior Member
    @doscicos, not all study abroad programs have great arrival assistance. The one my D has applied to does not, its pretty independent, she has to sign a private lease for an apartment and pretty much find her way around for a few days. My thought was to stay 4-5 days before other students arrive to explore the city with her and help with the legalities and then get out of Dodge. She has travelled a bit including a two week backpacking trip this past May but never completely alone.

    However, I'm pretty set on doing it any way she wants and that would seem to be a end of program visit.
  • alcibiadealcibiade Registered User Posts: 586 Member
    Japan is just about the safest place you can go. You would be fine, it is ridiculous that your parents would want to cramp your style like that. I took my son (18) there this summer for a brief visit, then he went to live with a family for 10 days. He went into Tokyo on his own every day, no problem, often returning late at night. If your handlers are meeting you at Narita, there is absolutely no risk.
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