Am I wrong to feel upset?

mom24girls
Mon, 07 Jun 2010 11:03:01 +0000

this is a great thread because it is so real! My two observations:


No one is rational when it comes to their own child. We just love them too much. As hard as we try, and some are better than others, we are never completely able to withhold our emotions and sense that our child is more unique, wonderful and special than everyone else’s child. And, that as it should be, for we are their parents! But, as a result, we will always feel the sting of their disappointment in a disproportionate manner to the actual or perceived slight. Which is why it is excellent advice to keep our mouths shut or risk looking a little nuts!
Fairness (if one can expect it in the casting process…and that is certainly debatable!) is a PROCESS NOT A RESULT. There are lots of theories of fairness (ability, contribution to the program, seniority, need are just a few that pop into my mind). We each look to use the criteria that best fits our position. If our child is most talented, we believe talent should be the measure. If our child is a senior in high school, seniority should prevail. If our child hasn’t had a a lead and the other child always gets the lead, then taking turns seems like an excellent criteria. I think the best that we can ask for is that the PROCESS is fair for inevitably we can respectfully disagree on the result (after all, casting is subjective). Furthermore, different theater experiences might have different processes. For instance, I could see where a high school might choose to give the role to a competent senior who contributed for the past 3 years over a more talented freshman simply because that senior was a great kid who deserved acknowledgement.


As far as removing a posted cast list–how awful and disappointing!