Amherst Supplement Suggestions

joshmoser93
Mon, 01 Nov 2010 00:19:14 +0000

Here is what I wrote (rough/first draft)

The quote I chose to respond to was:

“Difficulty need not foreshadow despair or defeat. Rather achievement can be all the more satisfying because of obstacles surmounted.”

and my response:

Difficulty should never discourage one from a task. In fact, achievement is most satisfactory the longer it takes or the more difficult it is to accomplish. I place high value on achievement and on crossing the finish line. I believe that I must always finish what I have started. For example, I have been playing golf for almost two years now. I used to play baseball, lacrosse, and basketball, but when I picked up a golf club and found it to be the most difficult of sports, I became totally fixated on and obsessed with it. At first, I whiffed on almost every swing, and when I did make contact, the ball would sadly roll a few feet in front of me. I would look to my left and right and watch other golfers hit the ball so straight and far. How could I quit? I had to be able to hit the ball like he did. After my first six months of playing golf, I couldn’t shoot lower than 110. At the end of this summer, I played in a huge golf tournament and shot a 73, my best round in competitive golf. Numerically viewing my improvements was a surreal experience. As soon as I signed my scorecard and saw the number 73 written next to my name on the scoreboard, I felt unfamiliar delight. Although I only placed 10th, I knew that I had really won because of those two years of hard work and continual improvement. That being said, in golf, as in life, there is no finish line. Being a golfer is like running on a treadmill with the red line just out of reach. I will always strive to improve every part of my game. Even the best golfers in the world frequently talk about their desire to improve certain aspects of their game. This means that now, I must work even harder to continue to advance my skills. I definitely do agree with the statement that satisfaction definitely varies with the difficulty of the achievement, but improvement is far more important than accomplishment. I can always improve in everything I do, and so can everybody else. A friend of mine, who is an inspirational speaker says, “The biggest room in the world is the room for improvement.” The ability to recognize room for further development and the passion to not shy away from it is the most valuable skill to me.

Any criticisms or suggestions?