Can someone look over "Introduce Yourself" essay?

BritishAreComing
Mon, 12 Dec 2011 20:40:59 +0000

Hi there,
if anyone would be so kind as to look over that part of the supplement I’d be really grateful. I worry that I didn’t emphasize enough how this effects me “day to say”, or perhaps I took too long with the intro, or ended it too abruptly.

I’m a mess, huh?:)

I can PM to you if you PM me suggestions? Thank you