Deferred to Regular Decision... now what?

anothermom3
Wed, 10 Feb 2010 14:56:27 +0000

I speak from the perspective of a parent whose child was deferred then denied at his #1, and #2 schools, likely for the dreaded Cs on the senior year report card.

While the events of last year were very, very tough to accept in our house, particularly given that I knew that DS had a great deal on his plate, was involved in an award winning 20 hour plus per week EC the exact scope of which was likely not clear on his applications, and we still suspect that there were errors on his transcript reported to colleges at mid-year, and given that there were other students accepted at schools where he was denied to my complete surprize, it has been, so far, a blessing in disguise.

He learned his limits (they exist, yes they do…), that life is not always fair (yes, the schools may have received some transposed and incorrect grades at mid-year), and that, hard work must be selective, at times, to lead to success (perhaps all that work with the EC might have been better spent getting A grades, rather than less, though he did pull out 4s and 5s on the exams). Grades, at least at this stage of the game, are most important. Not only must one really work to achieve success, but one must cull and sift from amoung the many tasks on one’s plate to produce results…

DS1 entered his safety school with merit aid, and almost one year of credits thanks to 4s and 5s on AP exams. His current gpa is as near to perfect as it could be. He has a group of friends. While I am sure he still laments the events of senior year, including a lingering suspicion that errors on the mid-year report lead to denials, they are receeding for him, and compared to some of his hs peer group that are struggling with the demands of college work, his academic load is more than tolerable, and he’s begun to take on more challenges for himself, including a graduate level course in one area, and an independent project in another.

He had the struggle as a senior, and I am glad that, for the moment, it appears to be put behind him…I am convinced he would have succeeded in his reach schools, but I am also convinced that, in the environment he’s in, he will seek out and find challenges for himself going forward, even if the everyday classroom tasks do not tax him to the nines.

Your child will do fine where he lands. Watch, and see…our worries as parents are part of, it seems, the process of letting the offspring leave the nest…