Do "Over the top" birthday parties bother you?

mom2collegekids
Mon, 28 Feb 2011 13:36:07 +0000

* I often see women bringing their young daughters into the nail salon and think “Not sure that’s a great idea…**setting their expectations so high at such a young age.” **I’m of the mind-set that age has its privileges. You make your kids wait for certain things even if you can afford it because then it means more.

I have a close family member who got her eight-year old twins iphones for Christmas. While I have no doubt it is something they can afford, I can’t help but wonder…where do you go from there? *

When I was in high school, I went to a private all girls school. We had some affluent families at this school. I used to joke that some of these moms would take their D’s into the pricey dept stores and say, “one of each in size 5”. I remember thinking that these girls would have adjustment problems when they got into their 20s and perhaps had to live on a young married’s income.

My MIL is a case in point. She was the daughter of a senator; she went to boarding schools; she was very spoiled. She wasn’t taught any domestic skills at all. She had a very difficult time adjusting to living without her parents’ money. My FIL often had to work 3 jobs to make ends meet because she had no clue about economizing…and wasn’t willing to learn.

there was a book out about 10 years ago with a title something like…“How to say ‘no’ when your wallet can say ‘yes’.” It was an important book about not overindulging your kids.

As for those who rebel because they were raised with parents who are “too cheap”…that’s the other end of the spectrum…which is why moderation is usually better. Parents who are “too cheap,” " too strict," “too controlling” can have other serious problems with their kids. The answer isn’t to be “cheap”…the answer is to be reasonable and not overly indulgent.