Do you brag about your kids?

fendrock
Tue, 05 Dec 2006 09:01:29 +0000

Hepstar - I do not brag about my kids.

My mother brags to me about our relatives and her acquaintances all the time, and it makes me uncomfortable.

Perhaps it’s because I myself lead a quiet life and don’t do anything most people would consider bragworthy. Does this make me a lesser person? If a kid does nothing that is worth bragging about (stellar SATs, admission to Ivy League schools, play on the winning team, etc.) have they somehow “lost out” to those who do?

Bragging suggests that life is about being successful, that doing admirable things is what defines being an admirable person.

When parents overdo it, it can alienate their children - both because it impinges on their privacy, and because it raises the question - do my parents love me because of my accomplishments or because of who I am? What will happen if I fail at something?

I liked your example of the suit, by the way.

Also, there are plenty of people who decide never to have kids because they feel they overdid the parenting thing with their own siblings. Your experiences with your sister are perfectly valid in contributing to your assessment about how you will feel about being a father.