Does he have to stick with this to the end?

Lafalum84
Mon, 20 Apr 2009 11:30:19 +0000

A few things:

1) Colleges like both leadership positions and depth of commitment to an EC. They don’t like a year or two of a bunch of different activities - they’d prefer to see a long-term commitment with increasing levels of responsibility in an area of passion. That said, your son has 3 years with band. Quitting as a senior would require an explanation on his part. It might be a good essay topic, especially if for him this feels like a moral or ethical decision, or a way to make a statement to the band director that his unreasonableness can no longer be tolerated.

2) Band has got to be the #1 most common EC that colleges see, at least selective colleges. Scroll thru CC - EVERYONE’s kid is in band. (Including my DS). Band will not make him stand out from other applicants, unless those other applicants have few/no EC’s.

3) Is there another way to handle this? Can your son talk to the director respectfully, lay out his opinions - and the facts of the declining enrollment in the program - offer his advice on changes that are needed to keep kids involved, and then if the director blows him off or says “I see your point but I think I am right and nothing is going to change” then your son can say, “I’m sorry, but in that case my involvement in band has to end?” Perhaps some compromises could be reached that would make everyone happy.

3) In the end, it’s up to your son and how he feels. If staying in band will make him miserable, then he should quit. If he will miss it too much, then he should stay and learn that putting up with “unreasonable” bosses sometimes is part of life. But don’t make the decision based on what a college may or may not want. Have him make a decision based on this being your son’s one and only senior year of high school, and doing what he thinks is going to make him happiest in the long run.