Don't know what to do.

Oducko
Thu, 28 Jan 2016 16:21:24 +0000

I’ve sort of had a wake up call recently. To start off, I am a computer science major and currently a sophomore. I really have screwed up my college career. I did decent my freshman year receiving A’s and B’s but my sophomore year so far I’ve really screwed up. A little about me, I love gaming and watching cartoons. Call me immature, but it comforts me and puts me in a happy mood when i’m feeling down. I’ve sold most of my life so far to those two things spending hours playing games and watching shows and whatnot, so you could call me an addict. I play more than I study because for some reason I don’t feel motivated or I procrastinate to the point where I just rush it by looking up answers on the internet or posting it on a website to have people answer the question so I don’t learn the material. I’ve only failed or gotten bellow a B on one class and that was a trigonometry class. I fell in love with a girl who I would spend hours at her house hanging out with. Since she was in a community college learning English, she had tons of free time. Of course I failed the class since I fell terribly behind, and to have her only dump me later on too. I feel lonely and out of place here. My father a very successful doctor who studied at a top notch school thinks that his son is following in his footsteps but in all reality i’m a piece of shit. Even though we are mid term this semester I’ve already fallen behind and don’t know if I can get back up. I have two midterms one in calculus and another in computer science tomorrow and looking at the material feels like a man who only speaks English trying to read Chinese. I’m not sure what I’m doing here I loved my lower computer science classes since I understood them and even got A’s on them but had to take a year off of computer science because the class wasn’t offered and I also didn’t have the pre-reqs. I’m in this class not knowing what i’m doing half of the time while other students have been programming since high school… I can’t take any lower division computer science since i’ve taken all of them, and yet I feel incredibly lost. Math is confusing and if im struggling in first year calculus imagine how I will be later on when I have to take higher level math. I’m lonely and confused, and honestly don’t even feel like living anymore. The only plan that I have so far is to drop my math class and take it later but that would add another W and make three W’s in my record, as well as putting me even further behind my normal graduating schedule. I know that I myself can find the answers to my problem but typing this horribly put together message comforts me a bit. Thanks, for reading.