EPGY High- Read My Essay!

SweetestSith
Sat, 27 May 2006 16:41:06 +0000

Nice! Good expression. To be a little picky, there were a few grammar errors and some awkward sentence structure, such as “At the school I was put into classes according to grades, not according to my special skills or talents.” “the” is an article but does not refer to any previous noun. Try “public” or “private” school to clarify. Also, “according to MY grades” to keep the parallel sentence structure. And “I rather rapidly grasped the language” doesn’t need the word rather…

Basically, read it aloud and the awkward sentences should pop up. It is very nicely written though, and better than many college application essays I have read on here. And this is not your first language! Very nice.