girls cutting

somemom
Sun, 17 Apr 2005 14:56:50 +0000

Among a group of girls in my youngest’s class last year, there was a girl who wrote very dark poetry and dallied with the romanticness (is that a word?) of the sad & depressed lifestyle. There were several girls in this group who played along with her, writing some sad & depressed poetry, etc. I know there was a bit of cutting going on with at least one girl, another ended up with a serious eating disorder.

You could see that some of the girls were sort of trying it on, like trading jeans, while others had some real issues. The school nurse was aware of it, though could not speak in details with other parents, we definitely had the feeling the girls with more serious issued were going to be getting help, one definitely had treatment.

My DD flirted with this group and while I did not ban them, I also did not encourage huge involvement. Banning would have been impossible and also possibly made them more attractive. I did encourage one on one visits at our home, where we could do “normal” happy things.

Both of the saddest girls seemed to have normal lives and normal families, no major dysfunction apparent- though who really knows what goes on at home!?

My DD later would say she thought these girls had too much money and not enough love and were busy feeling sorry for themselves when other people had “real” problems. Yet, I know their parents and they were loved, but maybe not in the way they needed?? That is not to suggest that cutters don’t have real problems, but that these girls problems seemed to be more ones of feeling lost and not really knowing who they are inside, not having great confidence and seeking attention for being sad. There was some definite attention-seeking, including cutting in front of ohters.

Thank you to thisyearsgirls for being brave enough to post, it is so great to hear what might be a solution from some one who has been there.

I was very concerned about my DD when this was going on, I researched and read and did everything I could to make sure I would see ther signs if it got to her and she joined in. Luckily, we did not have that come up (as far as I could tell) and she is fine, but unless you are watchful and aware, how would you know!?

This is some scary stuff!