Grade my Essay please? Thanks!

Peachmarmalade
Mon, 13 Jan 2014 00:19:17 +0000

Thanks for the feedback jeremy. The examples I used were pretty forced, as I just kind of thought of them as I went along. In addition, I also forced in some vocabulary that was unnecessary, and I didn’t know that cliches should be avoided. Oh, and I can see how I really didn’t include the “make the best of it” part. It seems like I just wrote that they accepted that they experienced unfortunate events.
Next time, I’ll try to keep the prompt in mind and spend more time choosing examples that would work more smoothly. I just dived directly into writing so that’s why it was so long.
Again, thanks for the advice!