Grade my SAT essay

studyingforsat
Mon, 17 Sep 2012 19:36:43 +0000

This essay prompt was taken from the CD that comes with the third ed. of the BB. Please ready my essay and give it a score (out of 12). Feedback would be greatly appreciated!

Prompt: Often we see people who persist in trying to achieve a particular goal, even when all the evidence indicates that they will be unlikely to achieve it. When they succeed, we consider them courageous for having overcome impossible obstacles. but when they fail, we think of them as headstrong, foolhardy, and bent on self-destruction. To many people, great effort is only worthwhile when it results in success.

Adapted from Gilbert Brim, “Ambition”

Assignment: Is the effort involved in pursuing any goal valuable, even if the goal is not reached?

Response:

Effort is of paramount importance in the pursuit of any goal, even if the goal is not reached, because it paves the way for others to reach it and often times helps uncover something of significance.

During the early part of the 20th century, the British had imposed a tyrannical rule over India. Many Indian Civil Rights activists sacrificed their lives trying to gain India’s independence. This deterred several other Indians from taking action. It wasn’t until Gandhi that India started to move closer towards independence. Gandhi and his zealous following’s non violent stance led them to take brutal beatings, withstand arrest, and endure death. Although this defiant and headstrong attitude didn’t produce direct results it galvanized millions of Indians to take part in the fight for independence. At a time when resistance seemed futile, one man’s efforts helped inspire an entire nation to pave the way for India’s independence, which was gained in 1939.

Apart from inspiring others to reach a goal, effort has also led to some inadvertent, but significant discoveries in the scientific realm. During the mid 20th century, several scientists were conducting research into blackholes. This enigmatic phenomenon confounded several scientists who painstakingly ran tests, conducted experiments, and stargazed endlessly in an attempt to understand its inner mechanics. When research wasn’t returning any significant results and confidence seemed to be at an all time low in the scientific community, a globe changing discovery was made. Surprisingly it was this inadvertent discovery that would lead to the invention of the cellphone and change the world of communication forever.

In light of this effort is the single most valuable asset when trying to pursue any goal. Effort has the ability to inspire an entire nation as well as lead to a break through discovery that changes the way we communicate.

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