Grade This Essay? (will grade back)

LucidGman
Thu, 04 Jun 2015 14:22:55 +0000

Pretend you’re an SAT grader. Please give yourself 2-3 minutes to read over the following essay, and then assign it a grade ranging from 1-6 with a brief explanation. I’ll do the same to yours if need be! Thanks!

By the way, this is my second SAT practice essay, so please don’t be too harsh!

Prompt: Do people accomplish more when they accomplish things in their own way?

When people are given the choice to do things in their own way, they often end up accomplishing more than they would if they were given concrete instructions by someone else. The reason for this is that each person has their own strengths and weaknesses, and when one is given the opportunity to formulate their own plan, they will often take account of these.

In the novel “Things Fall Apart” by Chinua Achebe, a young man named Okonkwo is the descendant of an old debtor and alcoholic, Unoka. The tradition of the tribe is to continue the lifestyle of one’s ancestors, but Okonkwo is an independent young man who is indignant about the dishonorable standard of living that Unoka brings for his family. Okonkwo, from a very young age, is abstinent from alcohol, confrontational with others throughout the novel, and plants & harvests his own yams rather than begging for them like his father did. Okonkwo, in following his own way rather than obeying his father’s way of putting food on the table, becomes an “egwugwu,” one of the most respected members of the tribe, and amounts to more than his father ever did. In this way, it is evident that Okonkwo’s riches are the result of Okonkwo leading his own life, rather than following the tradition of following his ancestors’ way of life.

During the process of the unification of Germany in 1871, general Helmuth von Moltke, who led the Austro-Prussian and Franco-Prussian wars, was under the command of Prussian chancellor Otto von Bismarck. Bismarck placed a large amount of trust in von Moltke, and expected him to follow his every command. Von Moltke, however, was often credited for his creativity and instead of following the traditional warfare methods that Bismarck suggested, implemented newer technologies such as railroads and telegraph systems to mobilize and organize his armies in a more efficient fashion. Bismarck, although at first outraged by von Moltke’s disrespect towards his commands, soon realized that this strategy was overwhelmingly successful; the method that Moltke deployed is now frequently used by the modern armies that are still in effect today. Von Moltke went out of his way to craftily devise a better war strategy that resulted in major accomplishments: the defeat of both the Austrians and the French, and the unification of the German states. Helmuth’s creative approach and individuality indicate that success relies on the ability of the individual to devise his or her own game plan according to his or her strengths and weaknesses.

Have people failed by seeking and deploying their own, unique methods in their lives? Certainly. However, the overwhelming majority of these individual attempts, often driven by motivation and work ethic, succeed because they not only account for an individual’s strengths, but also for their weaknesses.