Help a frazzled parent

worknprogress
Sun, 10 Jan 2010 23:24:09 +0000

Wildwood11 - In answer to your question, do I think a form of ADD is the only explanation? No. I think the wild cards are motivation & stress. When working with young adults I often tell them that they are in a position to determine whether they have a true Attention Deficit. I know that we can fill out a survey or I can fill one out with the family and get the same results for two different kids, and it may not mean the same thing. What is critical in discerning what is going on is determining the level of motivation and the amount of stress one feels.

Some kids may not care about the same things as their parents. Gourmetmom talked about her son and his shoes. Maybe he just doesn’t care that much about his shoes and figures the shoes will get replaced (Obviously, that was not the case).

On the other hand, there are people (many of whom are posting on the board) who don’t want to root through their pockets and purses for keys and glasses. We set up systems, chastise ourselves when we don’t comply with our own standards, and generally feel stressed and disappointed with ourselves. That’s a different situation.

So, determining what is going on is part science, part experience.

One thing I have learned is that systems have to very, very simple in order to work. I have given up on purses with multiple pockets or elaborate organizers. I try to buy one with one outside pocket and a light colored lining so I can find whatever I have thrown into the purse.

I don’t use a sophisticated planner. I have a simple calender with me and a 5x8 spiral notebook that has no organization, but where I write any notes. Later, when I have my organizing day at home, I transfer info to the right place.

Anyway - as my screen name says - I am a work in progress. Add the whole menopausal thing and you can be assured that while I may appear very organized professionally (and I do), it take a LOT of effort.