Help! College issues with Ivy league son

nrtlax33
Thu, 12 Jul 2018 16:32:57 +0000

I believe OP’s family is going through a very difficult time right now. Some earlier posts are criticizing OP. We don’t know their circumstances. But I can see OP has high expectation for her son. Adjusting expectation and showing love are the keys to slowly turn things around. CS is a tough major. I guess OP’s son does not have much sayings at choosing another major. That might also contribute to the problem. Some people need those precious A grades. If they don’t get them, they have to change career plan. Some don’t need those A grades but they can’t accept their self-image and their standing in the class. Perfectionists who got 3.5 GPA can’t survive due to this reason. I believe it is important to really know your kid and don’t push them over the edge. We are very careful not to tell our kid that doing something is easy. If you tell your child (s)he can play tennis at the high level at US Open, you set a very high expectation. (if you read Madison Holleran’s story, her father said that.)

But most AOs are just ordinary human beings and they don’t have special talents separating geniuses from the merely talented, the merely talented from the borderline qualified. With easy standardized tests (or even no standardized test), easy courses and inflated grades in most HSs, etc,…

My child told us those “second-tier” kids in its high school all got AP 5. AP does not distinguish kids at top tier. Those who believe they are well-prepared by seeing AP 5 are likely to have problem when they adjust to the reality.