HOSA VP Essay Proofread Please?

CrucioWand
Sat, 30 Sep 2017 20:55:00 +0000

Okay, so I’m running for HOSA Vice President at my school, and we had to write an essay. Can you guys please check it out and make sure there are no errors, or if you have any suggestions to add anything or if there’s anything irrelevant, just let me know. I need help selling myself in this paper. The deadline is Monday, so any help is greatly appreciated! Thank you so much in advance!
Here’s the essay:

Hello, my name is ********* and I would like to be your HOSA Vice President. For those who don’t know me, I am an enthusiastic young woman who can’t decide whether I’m running for Vice President to prove to Trump that I don’t have to call for mass deportation to win or that I just want to help out in the field I feel too passionate about.

Jokes aside, I love the satisfaction of helping people and becoming an officer will definitely give the skills to help those most in need. I want to care for others, to make their day brighter and impact people for the better. That’s what I love about HOSA, we all have the common goal to help and improve the world through medicine.

This year, I hope to be more actively involved in our HOSA chapter and the health science academy in general. I am really looking forward to seeing this club flourish a lot more than it did last year because there’s so much potential and it’s such a great opportunity for us, who are all interested in medicine. I want to see us come together and grow as individuals, as a major, and as a class, and as future healthcare leaders of tomorrow.

Taking AP classes has improved my commitment that is sought out and rewarded. As a HOSA officer, I could bring a variety of traits and talents includes bringing up interesting ideas as well as being a loyal and responsible member. The main complaints about most of the clubs at our school are “boring” and not as involved. We need more events to unite our HOSA members. In order to have these events to succeed, HOSA needs a devoted team. I get along very well with others and am a great team member. Many people do not listen to others ideas and want to do everything their own way. However, I am willing to listen to both officers and members to find a compromise for what we are doing.

It has become clear to me that the more extracurricular activities I become involved with, I improve myself and become a better-rounded student. Being a part of HOSA will definitely further my skills as a leader, and undeniably allow me to help out others in need. Being an officer will certainly be an honor and my commitment to leadership, character, and community service will be definite. HOSA needs people willing to work hard and give up time. HOSA needs someone who will continue all the way, and not just be on the sidelines. HOSA needs someone like me.