How CC helped me help my D

calmom
Thu, 13 Apr 2017 02:55:17 +0000

I’d have to say that some of the posts in this thread seem to be illustrating the worst aspect of CC – the Ivy/prestige infatuation. That’s unfortunate because so much depends on fit and comfort level, and often a top scholarship student at a less-selective university is at a distinct advantage being the big fish in the small pond. I know that my son certainly experienced that at the CSU he graduated from.

My daughter did very well (and incurred plenty of debt) going the prestige/almost-Ivy route---- but never really felt that she fit in. Her happiest semester in 4 years was the one she did abroad – it was only there that she felt she had found her people and was truly getting the college experience she had imagined. She does feel strongly that she benefited from the rigorous academics at her college— so in hindsight she is very glad she made that choice … but there was a sacrifice as well.

My DD and DS took very similar paths in choice of major and graduate degrees, and in the end have both done well. They also have very different personalities and work/study styles.

We don’t know the OP’s daughter – we know that she is is considering one school that will relieve her and her family of any worries about finances, and where she is comfortable with the faculty and where she feels she will be happy. It is likely that she will be offered opportunities there that are beyond those experienced by most undergraduate, such as being able to collaborate with a professor on research, or being nominated for prestigious awards or fellowships. Without needing to worry about finances, she will have more freedom to take internships or travel abroad during summers, as well as possible study abroad. One thing I learned long ago as a parent of a globe-hopping kid – paying for international travel and living experiences is a whole lot cheaper than paying for college.

This is a choice that only the daughter and her parents can make – and anyone who now is going to malign the public U. by contrasting it with the Ivy is treading into smile-and-nod territory. If @SuburbMom wants your advice on this choice … she knows how to ask for it. She hasn’t.

I’d note that from what I know of the daughter’s academic interests, she may be going into a career field where a graduate degree will be extremely helpful. If the daughter wants to obtain a master of international relations, she will find that funding for those programs is very limited.

One more item that I would offer as food for thought: In the entire history of Rhodes Scholarships, U. of Mississippi has produced 25 Rhodes Scholars; only 20 have come from U.Penn. See http://www.rhodesscholar.org/assets/uploads/RS_Number%20of%20Winners%20by%20Institution_1_30_17.pdf

This is no accident-- it is likely a byproduct of how the Rhodes Scholarships are allocated by geographical district – some regions are more competitive than others. I’m raising this because this young woman who wanted the Huntsman program may very well have a applications for Rhodes, Marshall or Fulbright in her future. If that is something she might contemplate, then it may be in her best view in terms of her future career aspirations to take a long view.