How to deal with my current job?

Shrinkrap
Sun, 06 Feb 2011 14:32:58 +0000

Mostly just bookmarking this thread.

I know at this stage in the game, I would have trouble being objective and helpful.

But I will share some history.

At age 17, I graduated high school, and with some pressure from my family, took an Air Force ROTC scholarship to pay for college. By the time I was applying for medical school, and they were offering more commitment for more money, I had a sense of what I had done. Over the next 8 years, I lived in fear of having my training cut short, and later, losing custody of my kids, in order to honor my commitment.

In this next phase of my career, there were three woman whose lives and career I will follow for the next fifteen years. One of us would never have kids ( NOT what she wanted, but a reflection of her choices), I had two, and the third has two kids, and either she or her kids are out with illnesses a lot. I am estimating about a year of time off in the 10 years we “worked together”. We are all physicians.

I am trying my best not to be judgmental, so i will say that two of us covered a lot for the third who was less fortunate. Call me a fool, but it meant dictating notes from a hospital bed, while being induced, because my baby was failing to thrive. I did not feel like I could miss work.

Yes, I was a fool.

Fast forward a few years, and I was in charge of hiring and firing, but as the “last man”, had to work, and cover when at least four other physicians could not. I thought that was a “living hell”. At some point I thought that my, and my children’s good health, and the fact that my husband had benefits, put me in the position of having a career as an independent contractor.

For awhile, the going was VERY good,and even now, I feel VERY fortunate, but as a small business owner, I am constantly aware of the dollars and sense involved with every minute or hour I have the choice/ability to do something that does not earn income. I have taken an “independent contractor” job with the government, and am reminded of this very day, but still feel grateful to be able to stick with this, and not work for someone else.

I often felt I was “floating” those less fortunate than I.